I really want to be an empathetic, nice and very nice girl, however, whenever I try to be, I realize what I am, my disgusting existence, I hate being me so much, and it breaks my soul, if only I could to have the beauty of my companions, the intelligence, the ability to socialize and be liked, if I could be attractive, more self-confident, I don't know, maybe I would have a happier life. I know I'm being selfish by not recognizing the good things I have and only thinking about what I don't like, but that's not what it's about, I love having a beautiful family and the essentials to survive, but it's hard for me to enjoy myself of all this when I am so dissatisfied with myself, I hate every little part of me, and although every day I say that I am improving, it is difficult to ignore the actions that my parents do, the fact that they ignore me when I talk about something really important, the that they don't pay attention to what happens to me, that they think I'm stupid and that everything is fine, I know that even if they ask me what's wrong, I'll tell them nothing, but well, nothing I do is never enough. I always want to cry, sometimes I have no idea why, but I want to, I wish I could have even good reasons, my problems compared to others are nothing, why am I still here?...
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