kuroibara3

Just imagine the person you care and love the most. (That you know personally like a best friend or a significant other) They were really kind with you all the time. Then suddenly one day they just stopped caring about you. They pushed away any ounce of care you gave to them. They started treating you like absolute trash. Calling you a liar every time you tried to explain yourself and even at moments that you were just simply talking. You try texting them ‘What’s wrong’ and the next thing you know, they block you. And due to all of this happening you start blaming yourself and start thinking up of every single way you f*cked up. How would you feel? 
          	          
          	This is honestly how I feel right now. The combination of guilt, sadness, anger, and also suicidal thoughts. I know I’m getting affected by this too harshly, but I just can’t help it.

kuroibara3

Just imagine the person you care and love the most. (That you know personally like a best friend or a significant other) They were really kind with you all the time. Then suddenly one day they just stopped caring about you. They pushed away any ounce of care you gave to them. They started treating you like absolute trash. Calling you a liar every time you tried to explain yourself and even at moments that you were just simply talking. You try texting them ‘What’s wrong’ and the next thing you know, they block you. And due to all of this happening you start blaming yourself and start thinking up of every single way you f*cked up. How would you feel? 
                    
          This is honestly how I feel right now. The combination of guilt, sadness, anger, and also suicidal thoughts. I know I’m getting affected by this too harshly, but I just can’t help it.

kuroibara3

Darkness, that’s what’s been consuming me for the past few months. Over the past few months my overthinking has gotten worser and worser. Some days I can tolerate it and others I can’t. I wish I could go to a counselor or someone like that and talk to them about it. Yet my parents won’t let me, they think I’m perfectly fine. They’re underestimating how bad it is. Is it even normal for it to change my personality, affect my decisions, and give me suicidal thoughts? 
          
          Sometimes I’m aware that I’m overthinking and others I don’t. Even if I’m aware, I can’t stop myself at all. My overthinking wins every time. Yet some people don’t get that. I tell my parents and every time they simply say just stop overthinking. I always tell them, if it was that simple I would have already stopped. 
          
          I overthink over the most simplest things and sometimes I get called an idiot by some people for overthinking about them. Sometimes things trigger them to get extremely bad. 
          
          I know I’m keeping a good portion of you guys are waiting for me to update my fanfic. So I’ll try to get that up as soon as possible. Well anyways goodnight and for those who read through all of this : Thank You (^ ^)