kyle12494

@nightwing43 Is it a story based on someone else's book? Does it take place in Akira's world (Or Donovan's, hehehe) or is it a land you're creating? If it has someone else's characters than you should ask permission first, some people don't like their characters taken. 
          	
          	If it's an original story with ideas based on other stories than you're probably okay.

kyle12494

@nightwing43 Is it a story based on someone else's book? Does it take place in Akira's world (Or Donovan's, hehehe) or is it a land you're creating? If it has someone else's characters than you should ask permission first, some people don't like their characters taken. 
          
          If it's an original story with ideas based on other stories than you're probably okay.

kyle12494

@nightwing43 Honestly I know nothing about Terminator. But from what I read, you need grammatical and spelling corrections. Take more time writing your story to get your words just right. Make sure you have good punctuation and keep sentences small but detailed. Also, I'd suggest a prologue or a background chapter before chapter one explaining the Terminators and the basis for the story. Lastly, introduce characters with a description. Like...
          
           "Find a position to snipe" Ghost Squad's captain said to a smaller gentleman with long brown hair. "And when you are about to fire, give us a signal," the captain continued on. The dark-skinned young man, of only 23, was used to being lectured by his loud, tall, obscenely white captain. He honestly wondered how the captain managed to stay in camo with skin that glowed like the moon. 
          
          Get what I'm saying? Description, grammar and punctuation, feelings and whatnot. Make it real, make it personal. Draw the reader in.