"My depression is a shapeshifter. One day it's as small as a firefly in the palm of a bear. The next, it's the bear. On those days, I play dead until the bear leaves me alone."
"Mom says: 'I thought the problem was that you cant get out of bed.' I can't anxiety holds me a hostage inside of my house, inside of my head. Mom says: 'Where did anxiety come from?' Anxiety is the cousin visiting from out of town depression felt obligated to bring to the party. Mom, I am the party! Only I am a party I don't want to be at."
"Mom says: 'Why don't you try to go to actually parties? See your friends.' Sure! I make plans, I make plans, but I don't wanna go. I make plans because I know I should want to go. I know sometimes I've wanted to go, it's just not that much fun having fun when you don't wanna have fun, mom."
"Insomnia has this perfect way to make the moon feel like perfect company."
"Mom says: 'Try counting sheep.' But I can only count reasons to stay awake, so I go for walks."
"Mom says: 'Happy is a decision' My happy is as hollow as a pin pricked egg. My happy is a high fever that will break."
"Mom says: 'You're so good at making something out of nothing.' and then flat out asks me if I am afraid of dying....."
"...No, I am afraid of living."
"Mom, I am lonely I think I learnt how it when dad left how to turn my anger into lonely. The lonely into busy, so when I tell you I've been super busy lately, I mean I've been falling asleep watching Sportscenter on the couch to avoid confronting the empty side of my bed, but my depression always drags me back to my bed until my bones are the forgotten fossil as a skeleton sunken city."
"The hallow auditorium of my chest swoons with echos of a heart beat."
"Mom still doesn't understand. Mom, can you see that neither can I?!
