@lumosed
this feeling, it happens in your chest. where you can't breathe anymore so you distract yourself because being distracted equals being happy and one moment you're crying so hard you can't breathe but the next you're so drunk on distractions and artificial happiness you created for yourself.
but i can't help, falling in love with you.
it. hurts. a. lot.
i'm breathing too hard thinking about all that i have to do. i try to breathe to calm myself down but the only thing i'm doing is making myself feel dizzy.
there are too many people staring, watching, judging. there are too many people in general. my face is streaked with tears and i'm sweating and i feel sick and the room is just a big jumbo and i try and try and try to shut them out until i can't anymore.
it hurts to look at him when he doesn't even spare me a glance.
my head's spinning and suddenly the world is too hot, too bright. and suddenly i feel sick, sick of the world and sick of reality, sick and tired of everything.
hurt.
