wuchangchang
I’ve been wanting to talk to you people about something that’s been on my mind for a while. It’s about being a feminist and why I find it difficult to connect with the statement, “I am a feminist.”
These days, we often see pseudo-feminists on the rise. They overshadow real feminism by promoting hatred towards the other gender and claiming superiority, which undermines the true cause. As a result, genuine feminists are often sidelined, and their opinions lose significance because people tend to associate everyone with the former group. Some women claim to be feminists without understanding its true meaning, and they overlook the double standards in society, which further complicates things.
When I ask myself, “Am I a feminist?” I struggle to connect with this title, and here’s why—I’ve never experienced oppression within my family for being a girl. Not only me, but my mother, grandmothers, and every female in my family have always been treated with respect, kindness, love, and, most importantly, equality. I’ve never encountered the issues women face in society, either in my family or in my surroundings.
The fight for feminism and its achievements feel second nature to me because I never had to fight for them. Women in my family have always enjoyed these rights. This is what troubles me—I support the cause of feminism, but I find it hard to personally connect with the title, “I am a feminist.”
Some women feel empowered by the statement but that is not the case for me because since my childhood I’ve been raised like that. The title it feels foreign and I don’t want to sound insensitive but I really don’t connect to this. Sorry I’ve been meaning to talk to someone about this. I’m open to discussion not bashing.
maal_piyenge
@wuchangchang I also don’t know how and where you found me but I’d like to tell you something about me. As an avid reader on Wattpad, I often find myself pulling my hair at the countless dumb female leads in stories. These characters are frequently depicted as weak, submissive, and overly soft. It's infuriating to see such regressive portrayals of women, especially when they're presented as the norm. My frustration often boils over into comments, where I call out these problematic representations. However, as I reflect on my interactions online, I realize that my enthusiasm for feminism can sometimes lead me to overlook the nuances of real-life situations. In recent times, I've noticed that feminism has taken on a life of its own, with some individuals using it as an excuse to bring down others, rather than as a tool for genuine social change. There are instances where feminism is used unnecessarily, leading to the oppression of men about which people generally don’t talk about. It's essential to acknowledge that men can face oppression just like women. Patriarchal norms can be damaging to men, restricting their emotional expression. Some men are even subjected to unfair treatment, such as false accusations or discrimination. It’s crucial for me to recognize these complexities and approach each situation with empathy and critical thinking. Trust me, it’s so complex that words are not enough to justify what I feel.
maal_piyenge
I completely understand where you're coming from. It's nice to see someone acknowledge the complexities of feminism and give their personal stance. Your perspective highlights the importance of complexities within feminism. Not everyone's experiences are the same and it's crucial to recognize and respect those differences.
According to me pseudo feminism is about using the label as a means to gain power, attention, or validation. It is also about creating a false narrative of victimhood, where women are portrayed as perpetual victims and men are labelled as oppressors.
As someone who genuinely cares about feminism, I find it frustrating to see pseudo-feminists hijacking the conversation and distracting from the real issues. True feminism is about creating a more equitable society, where everyone has the opportunity to thrive.
Your support for the cause of feminism is what truly matters, regardless of whether you identify with the title "I am a feminist.”
Don't worry about not being able to personally connect with the title. Instead, focus on supporting the rights and dignity of all individuals regardless of gender.
