hi love, so sorry for the late reply i only just saw this for some reason!! my number one suggestion would be to ALWAYSSS read the dialogue out loud and make sure it makes sense and is something your character would say! proofreading is super important too! a little tip i always use is if i want my character to have a specific like persona i make a pinterest board or just scroll on Pinterest it helps a tonnnn especially if i find good quotes/peoms that match my idea of the oc bc it helps me build their character! best of luck