Hola, I'm Mauro.
My friends call me Mario.

People notice that I'm gay before they notice that I'm Mexican.
But I was born in Michigan, whoops.
I don't actually know Spanish too well, my parents have an accent, I don't. 

I can be rude, really rude. 
I hardly ever apologize.

If you say, "hey, Mario, can I be your Luigi?" I will not hesitate to punch you in the cunt.

I hate basic books where you can completely tell how they end. 
Get creative. 

I write songs and read books.

Don't piss me off.
Remember, it ain't nothin' to cut that bitch off.