moonie_mochi5710

Hey there Mochi!! Probably you don't remember me and stuff, but uh.. does the username "SincerelyJaeMints" ring the bell? :) If you're wondering- I deleted my old account because it got hijacked for some reason, so this is now my permanent account :D.
          
          I'm glad that you're doing okay! I was honestly worried, but it's good that you're now in good shape! Tbh it has been uh... 2-3 years?? Probably 4? I cannot count nor remember- but it has been a long while! If you're gonna ask me, I'm doing great myself! Although I've stopped my roleplaying and kpop phase for a while now and I'm not really that active in Wattpad anymore, but I'm glad one of my friends who were still active told me on Discord about you finally leaving an update! 
          
          There are times that I'd go back to this account and read our past (and lowkey cringey-) roleplays we made. H&P was the first roleplay applyfic I've ever applied to until roleplaying became some sort of hobby of mine and started roleplaying from other roleplay applyfics. I even made an roleplay applyfic and it was successful! (but I had to discontinue it due to my inconsistent updates)

Hello... Yes, it's me. It's really me, Mochi. I've finally been able to access this account. I know. You're either confused or angry or both. I don't blame you...I will explain everything right now. What I'm going to say are reasons, but NEVER excuses.
          
          I went through too much. I thought I wasn't going to make it. I almost didn't, and it took a while before I could open my eyes again and this time, my mind. I thought that if I wasn't here, everything would be better and I wouldn't feel anymore pain. All of those thoughts messed with my mind and I fell into a deep hole, one I thought I could never get out of. I struggled with self-love and relied on others which was my biggest mistake. My worst mistake. I relied on the wrong people; I wasn't true to myself. Even the person who pronounced me non-existent wasn't who I thought they were.
          
          I feel completely healthy and stable. I struggled to come back to this account for a while, but I finally did it, and it is to apologize.
          
          With my whole heart, I express my deepest guilt, and with that, I am truly sorry... I shouldn't have tried to escape. I shouldn't have tried to end it all. I shouldn't have trusted the wrong people. I shouldn't have left you all here. But, I just hope that all of you are on a better path, a road filled with success, self-love, and good health.
          
          It's okay to be angry at me. It's okay to feel anything you are feeling right now. I'm not asking for forgiveness. I would've been angry too. Right now, all I feel is guilt. Guilt for leaving you all behind. I promise that I am doing better and my mind is stable. I don't think I will come back here (in the sense of returning to this account) because all of you deserve someone better. Once again, I express my deepest guilt and I apologize for leaving you all behind. Take care of yourselves, stay safe, and allow your hearts to be filled with love for each other.

i cant believe that its been a year since then.... imy

i wish you were still here. you changed my life so damn much. thank you so much for helping me discover myself. if it werent for you, id be a complete piece if garbage right now. i honestly still cant believe its been a year since you passed. you are one of the only people i would ever entrust my life too. i hope that you arent doin too bad in the afterlife. thanks, mochi. for everything. :)
          - ren

Owner of Amy, Coco, Hunter and Namu here. We all miss you so much. H&P was an amazing company to be a part of. I hope you are happy wherever you are Mochi <3 Sending my love and blessings to paradise. 
          
          - Kei 

just coming back here gives me the memories that happened before i’m sad that i won’t be able to experience that anymore

hey.. the owner of Younghwan here. Happy New Year tho! I had a fun day today. I celebrated Jennie's bday with some relatives by playing off BP songs and doing fun games. Although we only know each other through here, I still miss our chats...and you..rest well and plz look down at me and send me good lucks. Miss you bud.. xxx Young

one of the first applyfics I ever joined , and I honestly have jo regrets . it was so much fun in h&p . it was fun talking to you and others , and making friends .
          
          mochi , its 2020 . its been ... a year or two now ? gosh smister .... its been a while . I miss you so damn much , and I keep coming back here for the memories .
          
          I really wish you were still here .

Oppa you promised you wouldn't leave me,you said that you'd always be here for me but now you're gone and it hurts to know that you're not somewhere smiling right now hurts to know that the assholes on this app sent you to an early grave hurts and i'm trying to hold on because i promised you that no matter what i wouldn't do it but it's so hard with out you here I've been listening to the same song on repeat and i wish i could sing it to you because i really wanna know if there was something more i could have done to help to prevent this all if only i could go back in time and say how i felt i would because i loved you so much and i'm so sorry i didn't say it then because maybe it would have made a difference i really but i know it's too late and i'm sorry Rest In Heaven my guardian angel 
                                                                                                                                                  Love~
                                                                                                                                                         Blessin

I miss you bubby