mxryxmeyy

Why does October end up being the worst? Like c'mon it's supposed to be my b'day month not a survival show

mxryxmeyy

this message may be offensive
Oh respectfully, what the Hell's with my life?
          Believe that I fought so hard to stay civil.
          Went to war with myself, and Heaven knows it too
          But this is life, where I'm destined to lose
          And what the Hell's with my life?
          Am I supposed to live?— or s'posed to die?
          I don't understand, I'm so confused...
          Death pays a visit, and leaves a bruise
          Then life fills me up, and promises good times
          But promises are made to break everytime
          So I collect my pain, my hurt, my anguish, and make it rhyme—
          Make it seem pretty every fucking time—

mxryxmeyy

Something long passed
          
          The warmth I offer is returned cold
          I've grasped on tightly to something I can't hold
          The sparks were there, but are fading slowly
          Since when did life become so lonely?
          I laughed too loudly for a crowd so deaf
          I spoke out loudly but got whispers instead
          It's always one step forward and three steps back
          And somewhere along the way, I've lost track
          Was I too much, or not enough?
          Did the silence mean you're calling my bluff?
          Every effort hides a silent plea
          But no one's really hearing me
          It felt like forever but ended so fast
          I'm holding on to the pieces of something long passed
          
          
          ---

mxryxmeyy

Guys, how do you cope up with being in a household where your parents are supposed to be divorced but aren't? How do you cut out the noise and focus on studies? How do you stay nonchalant like your life isn't on the brink of crumbling all over the place?

itskennywrites

@mxryxmeyy lmao that sounds exactly like my household. You just accept it and live with it. Just try not to let it affect you, that's the best you can do. Don't let people define your mood, don't let their words control how you react. 
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Slave_of_Ar-Rahman

@mxryxmeyy 
            You are not failing just because you’re feeling. And your worth is not determined by the chaos around you. Allah is Al-Hakeem – The Most Wise – and this story of your life will not end in sorrow if you hold on to Him. Trust that what feels like a breakdown might actually be a breakthrough in disguise.
            
            Take it day by day. Breathe. Make du'a. And remember:
            Allah sees you. Allah hears you. And Allah will never abandon you.
            
            With all my love for the sake of Allah,
            Your sister in Deen 
            @Slave_of_Ar-Rahman 
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Slave_of_Ar-Rahman

@mxryxmeyy 
            So what can you do practically, and spiritually?
            
            1. Turn your grief into du’a.
            Every time you're about to break down, whisper:
            "Ya Allah, be enough for me when nothing else is."
            "Ya Latif, make this heaviness gentle on my heart."
            
            
            2. Guard your five daily prayers like a life jacket.
            Even if the world feels like it’s sinking, Salah keeps you afloat.
            
            
            3. Make Qur’an your sanctuary.
            One ayah a day. Let its light clear the fog. Let Allah speak to your heart when the world shouts over it.
            
            
            4. Don’t pressure yourself to be “nonchalant.”
            You don’t have to numb yourself. Feel it. But give it to Allah—don’t carry it alone.
            
            
            5. Seek moments of stillness.
            Wake before Fajr, even if only once a week, and cry before the One who knows every piece of your heart.
            The Prophet ﷺ said:
            
            
            
            > “The closest a servant comes to his Lord is when he is prostrating, so make plenty of supplication.”
            (Sahih Muslim)
            
            
            
            6. On focusing during studies:
            Make the intention of seeking knowledge for the sake of Allah. Say before you begin:
            "Rabbi zidni ‘ilma" – “My Lord, increase me in knowledge” (Surah Taha 20:114)
            Barakah will flow into your time when your efforts are for His pleasure.
            
            
            7. Silence the noise with dhikr.
            Just say:
            
            
            
            > “HasbiyAllahu la ilaha illa Huwa, ‘alayhi tawakkaltu wa Huwa Rabbul ‘Arshil Adheem”
            (At-Tawbah 9:129)
            Often. It means: “Allah is sufficient for me; there is no deity except Him. Upon Him I place my trust.”
            
            
            
             A beautiful reminder from Ibn al-Qayyim رحمه الله:
            
            > “Sometimes Allah makes you go through the fire, not to burn you, but to refine you.”
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mxryxmeyy

I'm not who I am to anyone, no, not me at all
          I'm not who I am to anyone these days, not at all
          The skyline falls as I try to make sense of it all 

mxryxmeyy

GUYS- Should I delete my anthology? I kinda wanna delete that part of my life. Is it a wise decision = ̄ω ̄=      ?

pages_of_april

@mxryxmeyy 
            It is a wise decision butttt your writing is so gooodddf
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