el loves ari

love u

i couldnt thank you all enough. i know i'm very late, but i hope it still counts as i say this. i love you all! no words can explain how grateful i am for each and every one of you. 3K?! are you serious? my story easy certainly wasnt something i had imagined to be something like this. THANK YOU!!!!! YOU ALL HAVE A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN I COULD EVER PUT INTO WORDS!!! I AM FOREVER GRATEFUL FOR YOU!

i love anna. i love arianna. i love julia. they are my fucking best friends. i trust them with my whole life. i actually owe them my life. because without them, i wouldnt be here. and they are certainly not my bestfriends in that order. its by alphabetical order. and i cant be there for them so if somebody else is there for them, then i'll forever be grateful for you. please, just make sure they don't get hurt. it would kill me to see them get hurt without me. each and all three of them have their own special and unique place in my heart. and nothing will change that.

look i’m so sorry for not responding right away. if you message me, comment on something, or if you just feel like utter shit right now, i promise you that i’ll still try with everything in me to talk to you. it’s just been super hard the last week since i graduated and now i’m moving, and college is coming, and my aunt is sick in the hospital. trust me, i’m trying to get through this and be there for you. i’m trying to not be stressed or and i’m trying to have everything i possibly have under control under my control, and even though a lot of you don’t even know my name, i still care about all of you. i’m trying to be happy and focus on what makes me happy, but right now my education is going to come first. i do not want to sound selfish whatsoever. but right now, i don’t know if i can do this. i’m not so sure if i’m strong enough, if i’m smart enough, if i’m going to be let in by all of the people who i’m going to be surrounding myself with. i want them to accept who i am as a person, whether they want to or not. and since i don’t want to sound selfish, i’m going to make a promise. whether it’ll be days, weeks, months, years, i promise that i will come back. i’ll officially come back and just say, “i’ve missed you all.” because it’s true. i’m going to miss each and every one of you. why i’m saying this right now, is because i wanted to say that i’m going to be taking a break. i don’t know how long it’ll be, but i’ll come back. i promise. 

you must join the new thing me and julia came up with, it’s called “recognize the ducks”. you join it, i love you forever, you dont, julia will throw a grapefruit at you and i’ll poke your armpits. your choice. 

@fadeddolans oh my gosh thank you

@fadeddolans is it okay?

@lunardolans aww thanks bubs <33

it’s currently 9:45 p.m. and i just got home from softball practice. my knees literally gave out going up the stairs that i slipped and couldn’t make it back up, and my brother had to come and help me. i stg i’m not going to make it through college ): 

can you believe its been two months without malia? i hope she's okay. not knowing if she's even alive is fucking terrible.