m

and for anyone wondering what i’ve been up to lately i’m more active on twitter these days if you wanna catch me there @dalgummi & @haseulagenda (active on both). i’ve been doing freelance graphic design work which keeps me busy and creatively sane. i also spend a lot of time drawing digitally, trying to keep that part of me alive. on top of that i’m working on getting my degree, so yeah, life’s kinda full but good. i’m still writing too, just not putting it out on platforms like wattpad anymore. I definitely also hate fanfics and shipping people. That’s REAL and proper cringe.
          
          
          so yeah that’s me. still around, still making things happen, just in a quieter way. if you want to find me, twitter’s the best spot

capitalism is rotting everything. even fandom. even escape. wattpad wants you to pay to read. ao3 is flooded with AI fics. patreon locks the good stuff behind tiers. everything has a price. even love letters. and honestly.. fanfiction doesn’t hit the same. maybe it’s just me getting older. but maybe not. maybe it’s because culture is being algorithm-ed to death. kids today are growing up with pre packaged aesthetics instead of scenes. no real subcultures. no real rebellion. just moodboards and reposts and curated playlists that say nothing about who they really are. Gen z is too scared of being cringe to be real and that sucks. cause cringe is where the joy is. where the truth is. the unfiltered stuff. the late night monologues. the messy self-inserts. the ugly crying. i don’t know. i just miss when things felt felt. when we didn’t need to look good doing it.
          
          if you’re still making things with your own hands, your own words, your own messy little brain i love you. i’m rooting for you. don’t let this era make you feel stupid for caring.
          
          still here. still pissed.
          still writing.
          – mel 

also i hate what ai is doing to art. to fanfiction. to writing. to music. it’s making everything feel hollow. like it’s all been run through the same filter and pressed into a mold. and i hate the way people eat it up and call it “efficient” or “inspiring.” it’s not. it’s lazy and it’s killing what made the internet fun in the first place. i look at my old writing and yeah, it’s embarrassing. so is half of my past. but at least it was mine. :) at least i tried. now i scroll and see people (even GROWN ass people) letting bots write their “fics” and “stories” and calling themselves authors. and that’s… sad.
          
          and honestly? i feel bad for teens. for gen alpha. like genuinely. their brains never had a fair shot. they grew up inside a pandemic, raised by screens and isolation and overstimulation. everything got faster, louder, more addictive. they were handed phones before they even figured out who they were and now they’re expected to “build a brand” before they finish high school and the worst part is people don’t even see it as a tragedy. they joke about it. call them “chronically online” like they didn’t have to be. like this wasn’t all survival. and now attention spans are wrecked. social cues are off. cognitive development is stunted and no one wants to say it out loud. but it’s obvious. empathy’s changed for these kids. nuance is gone. conversations feel thin. it’s like we’re all buffering constantly.
          
          i don’t blame them. i blame the world that let it happen. i blame capitalism. i blame the tech industry. i blame every adult who turned away because “that’s just how kids are now.” 

—
          free palestine. i shouldn’t even have to write that. it should be obvious. we’re watching a genocide livestreamed and people are still dancing around the word. afraid of being labeled, canceled, losing followers. there are children being bombed and people are arguing about tone. ICE is a terrorist organization. trump is a fascist and if you still think any of this is “too extreme,” you haven’t been paying attention or you don’t want to. 
          
          the state of this world is ass. what israel’s doing is not defense. it’s ethnic cleansing. it’s apartheid and every country that funds it america, germany, the uk, etc.. is guilty and yeah russia too. their obsession with empire is killing people across borders. ukraine. kazakhstan. georgia. chechnya. these aren’t just headlines. they’re people. they’re cultures. they’re lives erased because some man thinks history owes him a throne. and europe bruv. y’all are fake as hell. always looking down at america but voted for fascists in 2024 like it was black friday. fpö, afd all these parties built on hate and nationalism and genocide-denial and you chose them. your grandparents would be proud, I guess.

june, idk what day, 2025. can’t sleep. 
          
          it’s been a while. i don’t write like this anymore. not because i don’t want to but because the internet started making it feel stupid to care about things too deeply. but i still do. i care a lot and i’m angry. i’m a staunch leftist. like real leftist lmao not vibes not “vote blue no matter who” not aesthetic. i mean abolitionist. i mean anti colonial. i mean feminist in the most radical, uncomfortable, unmarketable way.
          
          —

hi everyone !! don’t be surprised if your notifs get flooded. I wrote a very long paragraph that exceeded the word limit and I’m excited to share everything with you. 

Hey everyone, 
          I hope you're all doing well! I wanted to apologize for my inactivity on Wattpad lately. It's been quite a journey since I downloaded this app about 7 years ago when I was just a kid writing fanfiction. Now I’m 18! While my interests have evolved and I've moved away from fanfiction 3 years ago, I'm curious to know if you think I should start writing again. I'm open to exploring various topics and genres, so feel free to share your thoughts. Just to clarify, I won't be writing fanfiction or shipping real people, but I'm definitely up for creating stories involving fictional characters. Let me know what you think!

It’s my birthday tomorrow :) 

I’ve been very depressed so I’m sorry if I haven’t been updating. Stay safe. wear masks and wash your hands. Get vaccinated if possible 

Happy birthday Son Seungwan >.<