n4daidk
also sorry for being inactive, too many exams ☠️
n4daidk
n4daidk
i hate exams this is so overwhelming and too "real"
n4daidk
I FINALLY HAVE SOME TIME TO RELAX :D
(to be fair we got an absurd amount of assignments and ill need to start managing my day to allow more studying time but like it feels so nice to read a book or watch a movie after doing nothing but studying all day everyday for the past few weeks.)
latenightemotions_
@n4daidk girl dont even bc school for me hasnt started yet and im scared bc im gonna have sm work to do T-T but yes u relax girly, u deserve it :D
n4daidk
alsoo on a more positive note:
I GOT 102% ON MY GOODREADS READING CHALLENGE FOR 2023 <333
(TYPICAL OVERACHIEVER BUT LIKE IT FEELS GOOD)
n4daidk
SOMEONE I'VE BEEN WANTING TO CUT OFF CUT ME OFF FIRST
AND THEY'RE EXPECTING ME TO CRAWL BACK AND APOLOGIZE AND TELL THEM THAT "no im sorry it IS my fault for not always accommodating you, and i don't even mind that you ignored me without communicating what was wrong. please continue to invade my boundaries as long as you feel comfortable!! i will gladly do what you want all the time because i have no wants of my own and don't deserve to feel like my own person. you getting what you want is all that matters!!!! <333"
can't wait to see their reaction when they realize that it's never gonna happen :)
-heartrendxr
@n4daidk ooh that's great! also, be petty and don't bother even batting an eyelash in their direction
n4daidk
if you can't charm your way into their hearts, imprint yourself into their minds. impress them so hard they can't help but remember your name ♡
... or argue, make them so mad they can't think straight. plague their thoughts with your existence. either way they're thinking about you ;)
n4daidk
update: anxiety has been vanquished (aka significantly reduced)!!!
still feel like i want to punch something though except im super weak and ill probably end up with an injured hand :"D don't need that rn with two upcoming tests
also idek how i became this person this isn't the same person i was two years ago AT ALL. i didn't even consider myself a nerd or anything i just got decent grades and was fine with it. what happened to meeeee :(( like im so much more "successful" now but where did all this strange worrying and anxiousness arise from
atp there's nothing i don't worry about ☠️ ☠️
latenightemotions_
@n4daidk aww i hope that all goes well for u babes xx real omg i feel like punching smth all the time and thankfully i havent satisfied that need. yet. :D but i literally have exams coming up in two weeks so we'll see how that punching goes lol. YESS IM LITERALLY SO DIFFERENT TO WHO I WAS YEARS AGO AS WELL. for me its quite the opposite actually, my grades arent doing the best- BUT IM WORKING ON THEM :D right?? i literally dont even wanna go to school bc im always worrying about everything -__-
n4daidk
resisting the urge to spam everyone ik hdgshdh
if anxiety and procrastination had a daughter (mixed in a bit nvm A LOT of overachiever genes and extreme extroverted/ introvertedness) it would definitely be me :"D
n4daidk
pfft, we had parent-teacher meetings and almost all my teachers were like "you're great, continue like this and you'll get an awesome grade! id expect nothing less" and a lot of them were also like "she has so much nervous energy, she's always panicking and you think she's in a literal disaster. and then you look at her exams and you're like wow! she's doing fine, she just worries a lot for no reason haha"
and half of the time i was speechless because somehow nearly all my teachers (AND MY FRIENDS AND LITERALLY EVERYONE) managed to comment on how nervous i am and for nothing. like wow i knew i was a bit of nervous wreck but i didn't realize it was that obvious to everyone around me ☠️☠️
THE REST OF THE TIME HOWEVER i was like yayy! compliments ☺️☺️☺️
bro receiving compliments is awesome like the greatest feeling ever, im gonna go bask in my praise for the rest of the week (or month possibly) :D
latenightemotions_
@n4daidk AHH YES IM SO PROUD OF UU <33 AS U SHOULD BABES, BASK IN THAT PRAISE FOR AS LONG AS U WANT- U DESERVE IT XX omg yes the nervous thing is so real bc i have this one friend that notices everything i do or say or act ever since things have been tough for me and im real good at hiding it but she ALWAYS knows its kinda scary but im so grateful for her :D
n4daidk
me (who has straightened hair for photo day that's kinda poofy/frizzy) to my friends: is my hair frizzy?
friends (that im close to but not very): noo dw about it! ur hair looks awesome just tuck it behind your ear so it doesn't cover ur face and you'll look great!
close friends: YES IT LOOKS REALLY FRIZZY
bonus: one of my best friends was like "noo it looks really good! it's not that frizzy don't worry im sure ur photo will turn out great" then proceeds to give me tips to make it less frizzy ☠️☠️☠️ which im gonna try to follow cause she knows what she's talking about loll
brooo i love my friends so much kdhsjds this was hilarious
latenightemotions_
@n4daidk ok but tbh- im sure ur hair looked a trillion times better than mine on photo day. as a person with curly hair the frizz is REAL