Um....work on your grammar, plus you are a bit repetitive, use synonyms and such. You do have a great potential, and this is just constructive criticism. I like your idea, you just need to give it to me better.....that sounded pervy.....don't give it to me, just.....um..........take the time to describe what you would feel/see/smell/hear/taste/think in a situation, but don't use the overused words.
Grab an encyclopedia, I do it all the time. Life....is full of cycles. in those circuits, there are differences. It is those freedoms that make existing various for each person. Your life, a small, meaningless speck, may light the sky for a thriving civilization to bloom. It isn't the abyss that kills, but the writhing, lurking creatures that go bump in this night.
Do you wander the untread road at the base of this crevice? Take my hand, I'll guide you through this static unseen. Take my hand, be saved.
Or lay there, dying in your depression by the light of the fire's last dance.
