The thing is though, Ellen is not the man in that relationship either. She may dress more masculine, but that doesn't make her a man. She doesn't identify as a man so there is no man in the relationship. Also not all lesbian couples have one person that dresses or acts more masculine. Ali and I both dress and act like girls and we are equals in our relationship. I can understand why you thought that though, society has so many stereotypes that are not true. I just want you to realize that it is wrong to ask questions like that. I hope my explanation helps and if you have any more questions, I will certainly try my best to answer them.