pastelkaii
I’m now realizing I may have had a slight queer platonic crush on my friend in the past,,hmm
pastelkaii
pastelkaii
Okay for now the result of my gender/sexuality crisis is I might be genderfluid and bi oriented aroace
Bc like I’m not exactly interested in a romantic relationship but I’d love to be in a qpr and in that instance I don’t think gender would matter much? Therefore bi oriented aroace and I use all pronouns and I’m kinda every gender so they/he/she genderfluid :3
pastelkaii
I don’t have time for a pronoun/gender crisis
pastelkaii
Like I could probably be fine with she/her in certain instances and with specific people but idk
pastelkaii
I really need to know who approves the ads that are put on this app bc I’ve two that should not be here
pastelkaii
I actually feel bad for anyone who’s seen the two ads bc both of them are uncomfortable for very different reasons
pastelkaii
Like I’m pretty sure both of them have the potential to be super upsetting to people and it’s like why were these approved
pastelkaii
Missing internet friends who you didn’t know much about is wild bc it’s like,,I know your name and a few small things about you, that’s it
But I still have times where I miss you and wish we could have one last conversation
pastelkaii
Recently realized that they never actually saw my last message to them on insta which kinda makes that worse
pastelkaii
I think a reason why I still miss them so much is bc we didn’t really have a proper last conversation? Like a lot of my other internet friends I casually drifted away from but we had like conversations where we were like “hey I miss you I hope you’re okay” but with this person that didn’t happen
pastelkaii
Today I was thinking about internet friends I had who disappeared without a trace then I realized I’m 99% sure I may be that friend bc in 2016 I deleted a Instagram account that I made a bunch of friends on and I don’t think I ever told them my other account so sorry to sky, Violet and literally everyone who I was friends with on that account
pastelkaii
Tbf I think I think I had stopped talking to like all of them when I deleted (we casually drifted apart that’s what I mean-
pastelkaii
ang mensaheng ito ay maaaring nakaksakit
Why do people still write student x teacher that stuff is just weird and creepy and idc if the student is 18 or older there’s still this creepy dynamic
You know what people SHOULD write?? Teacher x teacher that shit is GOOD there’s not enough of it
pastelkaii
Missing internet friends who you haven’t spoken to in years is ~wild~ bc like the ones I think of either are inactive/hard to find on insta or completely disappeared from the internet so it’s like,,,idk I wonder if they feel the same way? Or if I don’t cross their mind as often as they cross mine? Idk
pastelkaii
Sorry I suddenly had more to add also this realization of “wow I wonder what they’d think of present me” bc for example all my internet friends from 2012-2014 have this version of me in their heads and idk if it’s changed but I haven’t spoken to some of my internet friends since 2014 so they’re just forever stuck with that version of me even though 2014 me is a INCREDIBLY different person from 2020 me so in a way 2014 me still exists out there (when really she shouldn’t) like bro in 2014 I thought I was cishet and six years later I’m definitely not cis and I’m also very gay so
pastelkaii
Also bc u have this realization that u have no idea what their life is like I guess?? Like one of my friends from 2012 could have dropped out of school, could be in a relationship Idk it’s weird I guess