Hello, it is I, a simple penguin.
I live in Antarctica. We have a lot of ice. I slip on the ice.
We also have polar bears. They are scary. I am scared of polar bears.
I have fought in a space - zombie apocalypse. I am an ally of the platypi. I am part of a very big penguin army. 
Please read my books. They took me a long time to write because I do not have human fingers. That is because I am a simple penguin.
Thank you for reading this, humans.
Sincerely,
your favorite penguin :)

On a side note, please follow our main accounts:
- @helloperson11
- @vanellet

THINGS that I, simple penguin, like:
-Harry Potter! (yes, we have wizard penguins in Antarctica too.)
-Space Zombies! (okay, I just like fighting them)
-Platypuses/platypii (I made a song about them)
-My fellow penguins (they forced me to write that)
-Cow (don't ask)