old used band-aid

If you could again imagine a totally hypothetical land where magic is real. 
          You call me and demand me over at once. 
          Being the amazing girlfriend that I am, I do just that. 
          You don't tell me what I'm there for but I arrive and you're waiting for me in the front yard. 
          What am I wearing? Oh. My comfort Bat Man shirt, black tights, a skirt, and black and white converse. 
          Because I'm adorable, besides the point- 
          You pull my hand inside, I wave goodbye to my parents who lovingly understood my urgency of seeing you. 
          I get violently pulled into your bedroom. The lights are off. 
          Several red candles are lit. Not for  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  but instead for atmosphere. 
          Curtains? Covering the window. It is already kind of dark outside. 
          On your bed are two hoodies, one is a hoodie I let you borrow, the other is yours it's your favorite. I promised to never steal it from you. 
          You throw it at me. 
          We put on the hoodies and turn on our favorite show. 
          I'm warm and cuddly. 
          There is a blanket surrounding us. 
          I've never felt safer. 
          You close the show and turn on a playlist. 
          We dance around your room until we're tired. 
          After totally rocking a jam session I lay down on  your bed. 
          You get on top of me? NO. 
          You sit down next to me and scoot close. 
          I let my legs trap you.
          You settle your head on my chest. 
          We pass out as the playlist goes into a slow song.
          Scenario over.

So imagine this totally hypothetical fantasy land where magic is real. 
          I call you and tell you to come over. You agree. 
          You come over and we walk to the park. I have a bag. 
          In it is two water guns. 
          The park has a lot of trees so we play hide and seek with water guns. 
          Our clothes get wet and we get cold so we go to my house. 
          I let you borrow my giant purple hoodie just in case you're getting dysphoria. 
          I just change into a different shirt I didn't get that wet because I'm awesome. Of course. 
          I turn on my computer. Wizard 101 loads up and we play for an hour. 
          We watch a movie. We cuddle. 
          Eventually you have to leave. I'm sad, but I'm not gonna cry,, or anythin,,g,,
          We jam out in the car to music on my favorite radio station. 
          I stare at you when a song comes on that makes me think of you. 
          Sadly, we arrive at your house. I step outside to get in the front seat of the car. 
          You stand there. I look at you. You look at me. 
          We're awkward. What do we do? Kiss? No. 
          I hug you and we just sit there for a little unsure of who is going to pull back first. 
          I of course being a pussy don't. 
          You of course also being a pussy don't. 
          You have to go inside at some point so I pull away. I want to stop and give you a kiss but I'm too cool and manly for that so I don't. 
          You give me a polite peck on the cheek and go inside. 
          End scenario.

https://soundcloud.com/user-228402753/undertale-all-i-want-for-christmas-is-you-by-papyrus-and-sans

so like. if i hired someone to hold my hand,,,, would that be prostitution?

bro what if we hold hands and talk about the end of the world?