Cadence

I wonder if he knows his mood effects me too 

I swear to god .... it’s Christmas for crying out loud why can’t my dad just keep his yap shut for once. My dad got my mom new hair tools and I told my little brother he could have my straightener since mom won’t be needing mine anymore and I just don’t use it and ofc my dad goes “straight boys don’t have hair straighteners” and me and my mom both looked at him and told him to stop saying shit like that and he blew up on everyone. So I took all my shit and locked myself in my room and all I could here is my mom telling my brother “you can like whatever you want and not be gay Bc that’s just not how it works” and here my dad goes “ya but ur not gonna have a hair straightener or girlie shit like that” I swear to god I wanted to smack the hell outta him and then my dad goes “why did she go to her room” and my goes “are u for real!? Our own kids don’t even wanna be out here with us Bc of you” and ofc that made dad more angry. So that’s my Christmas so far 

Ok I’m just having one of those nights were I want no one around me and just cry like no one text me, call me, talk to me, touch me, look at me, or even think about me just please I want to be left alone to cry for a while. 

Ok one more thing why do I feel like everyone is acting weird around me like are people just done with me ? Probably wouldn’t blame them 

Hi it’s been a while :) uhhhh ok so here’s the deal ever sense I was little, whenever I get like a nervous feeling out of no where something bad has always happened. And now that I’m older it hasn’t happened that much but today it’s been none stop sense my first hour class. And I’ve tried to see if anyone else feels the same way and so far it’s just me.  

man yesterday i watched this movie called clueless and i loved it, but it got me thinking about "bestfriends " and i stared to think i dont think anyone really thinks of me as one (and im not saying that to hurt myself ) and now im like super motevated to become or find a best freind. i want to become super close to someone or maybe even someone new. i just really miss being super close with that "one person" last time i was super close with someone.... was probly this girl named neaveh she was porbly the only person so far to become super close friends with me like ya ive had close friends before but me and he where insepreble. 
          my few close friends right now are autumn ava and pip but out of thoes 3 i think im the closest with ava or autumn . well i will find that person soon hopefuly

Like don’t get me wrong I love them but they can all be a pain in the ass sometimes 

Hey it’s been a while. I just want to say sometimes I think about my friend choices. 

Mom: *gives my wet wipe after being in Walmart
          Me: *starts rubbing the wipes together 
          Mom:*gives me a wired look
          Me: you gotta think about others mama. The rags need to be clean too.
          Mom: ....ur an idiot

My new favorite saying 
          “ paint me yellow and call me fucking sunshine !” - Sydney Novak