a sad potato sack

I FEEL ALIVE AGAIN SUP BITCHES

i saw someone in public that looked so much like you how are you

i o wn taxi cab wh at

Today at rehearsal we went on lockdown. Still shaken over thinking I was going to die holding onto one of my friends, the rest of them lost somewhere in the crowd. Always tell those close to you that you love them. 

It's settled. I'm unpublishing everything. I won't delete it, because it's a reminder of who I used to be, and sometimes these things are necessary. They won't be available for consumption though, which I believe is best. They are the product of me being unhappy with myself, which, to an extent, I still am. My hope is to reinvent who I am, make my writing better, and come back to you with something I am proud of. For so long I was ripping myself open, spilling my guts, and for what? To put words on a screen? To entertain someone? I can't be like this anymore. I don't know how long I'll take to work on myself. I'll still be active on here, and I'll continue to write, but until I can make something cohesive and, for lack of a better word, good, I'd rather keep my musings to myself. I'm sorry if this disappoints anyone, but I've already pushed myself too far and that damage is done. I refuse to reopen the wounds. 
          
          Love you guys. 

I changed my user. Update on the last post: I was dreaming. 

Am I happy or am I just dreaming?

I'm really trying to write for you guys but i want it to be good and lately all I can think to write is sad and ugh. I still love the story I'm working on, but hate the way I wrote it. Feeling uninspired, and just plain sad. The kind of sadness where it's just this constant dull ache, and I'm trying to work on me and my writing. I feel horrible for never posting, like I'm letting you guys down, and I guess I am. I don't know, maybe I'll post some one shots or something, just to give you something.

tfw you were writing a story you were really proud of and suddenly you went to write for it and you hate it and yourself

Yooooo