Amber Shen

the only artist i knew had fell into sickness. no one would want a sick soul.

maybe the heavens know, like how slowly van gogh and others lost their own aura and color in their own canvass. the spirit of an artist is too heavy for the world to carry or the world is hard to stay and look at. fading from the background of smile.

you'll discover people didnt have a choice but to wear a soul, pretend they're alive but the truth is they already died a long time ago. there's this guilt that you need to go on or else the chatters of the world will ambush you still if you deliberately choose the afterlife. it's very sad

- 035188 
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it's so sad how may facebook has been disabled and there's no way it will be recovered just like some fb users too. i had it for 6 years. i actually cried last night. i guess i should let go of it.

when you thought that something's belong to you, resembles you, a part even and days passed it feels like those weren't that special or destined to be something you will like forever. i kinda have detachment from what makes me, everythingi thought i am or should be. and it feels like i won't be returning, love it the same and completely let it go. like writing, and what i liked most. it's escaping from my heart, senses and being. i guess, things gradually happens such as unloving the once precious hobbies etc.

I hope in my next lives, I'd be a better, good person and I would live well and... safe. That's all.

I never had diary entries for months, I've been so lazy to do that as if I could let go of all the knots in my heart. I am just attending my own clown show. It’s hard, even harder to write. To hold my anxious hand.

in my dreams, the sky is boundless and beautiful, so contrary when i open my eyes.