ramestice

She deserves more than anything I could ever give her

I’ve been wanting to leave for so long but now I’ve gone and made a promise I would never forgive myself for if I ever broke

I don’t want to be here anymore

And now my fucked up brain is constantly switching between acceptance and anger and I know I shouldn’t be angry, I know she deserves better than everything life has given her (than having Me as a good-for-nothing child) but I’m so tired

The same month I plan to leave for good is the same month my mother gets a cancer diagnosis and makes me promise to her that she’ll see me graduate college one day

Genuinely believe the universe just loves to make fun of me

My life is a fucking joke

Okay yeah no I’m getting nowhere by being here, dragging myself off this site for now before I overshare even more bye

Just let me die already

The fact that I have to keep food and basic hygiene in my mental check list (and, now that I think about it, I’ve BEEN keeping them there for years now) is probably a sign that I am too fucking far gone for any sort of help