yanie morisson

This is probably the worst day of my life. Imagine idisowned ka ng tatay mo? Hahahaaha tangina. Siguro kung wala lang akong mga kapatid, nagpakamatay nalang talaga ko. I’d rather die kesa mafeel to. Hindi ako matigil sa pag iyak. Parang lahat nalang ng magandang memories naglaho ng parang bula. Parang pinagsisisihan kong nagkaroon ako ng mga ganung memories. Ang sakit. Sasabihan ka ng masasakit na salita. Mumurahin ka. Siguro nga napakasama kong tao para maramdaman ko to. Napakamalas ko sa magulang. Sobrang malas. Nanay ko walang pake. Nagpapakasarap sa buhay dalaga niya. Tatay ko? Hahaha. Ayun kasama paborito niyang anak. Nakakainis lang. Hindi naman ako magsasalita sana kaso sobra na. Sumosobra na. Sobrang babaw ng luha ko pagdating sa kanya kasi imagine siya na lang yung magulang ko tapos ganito pa. Lord please make this pain stop. Hindi ko na alam kung anong gagawin ko. Please Lord.

“Makakahanap ka din ng para sa’yo” easier said than done??? Hahahaha keme! Pero sana nga josh. Sana nga. 

So nagheart to heart talk kami ni ex at ayun. Ewan ko hahahahah. I’m still crying. Maybe I’m happy kasi he already met his the one? Maybe because nagagawa niya na sa iba yung mga bagay na hindi niya nagawa sa’kin before? Am I sad? Kasi wala na talaga kaming chance? This is fucking weird. The truth is, whenever I talk to my friends about my exes, lagi kong sinasabi na kung may babalikan man ako, siya yun. Pero ngayon, wala na kong babalikan. Kasi masaya na siya sa iba. Mixed emotions? Infatuation lang ba itong nararamdama ko or hanggang ngayon may nararamdaman parin talaga ako para sa kanya? I don’t know, and I don’t want to find out.

This is the place where I belong. I’m glad to be back. 

I think I should keep myself away from you.

No. I don't like him.
          
          I should slam that in my head so hard that I will not have a chance to forget it. I have to admit to myself that I don't like him or else...

Kaya ayokong nagkakaroon ng ganitong set up ng friends. Before sanay akong mag-isa pero sinanay niyo ko na dapat lagi tayong magkakasama. Tapos ngayon iniiwan niyo nanaman ako sa ere. Putanginang buhay 'to.

Hi wattpad. So you see, I don't have a permanent friends. I have a lot of groups but I don't have someone in particular who I can share what is going through in my mind. It really hurts me because sometimes, when I'm trying to share something, the topic will be changed immediately so ang tendency, ayun sasarilihin ko nalang. Kasi alangan namang isshare ko pa e wala na sa topic yung gusto kong sabihin. Sometimes chinachat ko yung mga former classmates ko. Pero parang wala naman silang ganang kausapin ako "wtf are you crazy" "sabog ka no". Can't you just fucking listen. Para kasing ayaw niyo kong pakinggan. I know, you guys have your own lives. But I just need someone to talk to. For 5 minutes? Yeah right I'm an attention seeker. But can't I just have someone who will not be tired of listening sa mga rants ko sa buhay? If you'll suggest to get myself a boyfriend, oh man. I don't need them. I just need a friend.

Re-watching one of my favorite movie that I haven't seen for a long time gives me this nostalgic feeling.

It's so amazing that you guys know what to do with your lives and you already have plans for the future and here I am, a piece of trash who don't have any idea what to do anymore. I'm so sad knowing I'm not going to be happy in the future because I didn't chose the path that will make me happy. Oh. Let me correct that. You didn't let me choose what makes me happy. I regretted that I didn't choose what truly makes me happy. I shouldn't have listened to anyone. Now I'm not sure of what should I do. I fucking need help but nobody bothers to listen. Fucked up world.