Excerpt from How to Make it in Hollywood:The Inside Story
IF YOU WRITE IT WELL, THEY WILL COME
Although there is great pain in casting, there is also joy. In the movie KGOD (later retitled) Pray TV, there was one part left, and it was almost impossible to cast—a preacher/auctioneer. We had dozens of actors read for the part. Finally, co-writer, Dick Chudnow, threw up his hands and said, “Let’s call the auctioneer’s union and get a real auctioneer!” Casting director, Fern Champion, said, “Just give this one last guy a shot.” His name was Woody Eney, scripted name, Reverend Hal Tramer. In his scene, he takes a breath, spits out a wad of tobacco, and starts to preach: TRAMER: And the Lord sayeth unto his disciples, ”Giveth your first born unto the Lord and be plentiful and multiply.” But they couldn’t multiply ‘cause they hadn’t learned simple addition yet. So they begot. They begot whenever they could.
(faster:) And unto them Shem, the father of all the children of Eber, the brother of Japeth the Elder, even unto him were children born.
(faster yet:) and Eber begat Salah and Salah begat Obal.(even faster:) And Obal begat Sheba and Jobab and Jobab begat Samuel and Sanuel begat Claude and Claude begat Bee Bee and Bee Bee begat and forgot to begot so she hopped to the hop doing the bibbity bobbity boo.
(auctioning:) I got a boo, I got a bop, I got a—
DIRECTOR (V.O. from booth): Cut!
DIRECTOR: CUT!!!
TRAMER: I got another cut. I got two cuts, do I hear three—
DIRECTOR: Would you please leave the stage!
TRAMER: I gotta leave the stage. I gotta leave the stage once. I gotta leave the stage twice. I gotta leave the stage three times. Gone! I’m off the stage. SEE THIS EXCERPT ON YOUTUBE:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8bMD4FnW6c
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