My mom died on may first 34 days before my 15th birthday of ovarian cancer. She fought a long and hard four year battle against cancer until it spread to her stomach once it spread the doctor's could no longer distinguish the cancer tumors from her stomach. That was when she decided to go into hospice that decision broke me. When she made that decision it hurt, it meant that my mom the person I knew that never backed down had given up, it meant that the one person that I could lean on was gone. The first person I had told my mom had died was my friend Leo I texted him telling him she was dead and asked him not to tell anyone, and by the time I got back to Maine I had shoved all my emotions into the deepest darkest corner of my heart and for awhile that worked until I broke, the first time I cried after she died was a few months later when I lied down in bed and just broke down, and after that all I did was cry myself to sleep, for months I woke up every morning and put on a fake smile, for months I would lie and say I'm fine or "no nothing is wrong", for months all I could smell was the hospital room she was in, for months I wanted to die, for months all I wanted was to hug her one last time or hear her say I love you one more time. 

Oh and I have one more thing to say not that anyone will read this but if someone important to you was died recently you need to know you will NEVER get over it or just move on, the death of a loved one is something you have to work through and learn to live with, and if I can learn to live without my mom and I'm only 16 than you can too. 

If you have to take one thing away from my story is that no matter how much you believed you have recovered you will have good days and bad days.

Now I'm signing off and if you ever need some one to talk to Wattpad has a messaging system and I'm here.

- Forrester