Desh

aknjmnnmsR? Nkec

I wonder if she knows. 

knmmstl

was

yfaigpbf

Hola, Author! Oks na ba kayo ni rain? Ngayon na lang ulit ako napadaan here sa account mo. I hope all goods na :))

I love you, baby. 
          
          

I regret a lot not because I lost you but because I know I was the reason you walked away.. I took everything for granted, lied, hid, made mistakes and failed to tell you that it took 2 years.. and that..  destroyed us.. I failed to protect your heart when I had the chance. Losing you taught me a lesson that I wish I had learned earlier. Now, all I have left to say are the vows, promises to you and to God, how much I genuinely and truly love you and a sincere apology. 
          I'm sorry for the pain I've caused. The lies, the deception.. every mistake I made. I'm sorry for the moments that I should've told you the truth but instead, I let fear consume me. I'm sorry the fear ate me even though I know you could accept what I really am or who I really am. I'm sorry for all the things I've done that you didn't deserve.. You're my baby.. My mistakes were never a reflection of how much you meant to me, of how much I love you. 
          I don't promise perfection, but I promise growth. I've changed not just out of fear of losing you completely, but out of understanding what love truly requires.. Patience, accountability, true love and deep understanding, and the courage to be better than who I was before. Kaya if there is a moment, even a little space, a little chance, a little love, a little understanding, forgiveness, you find in your heart for me, I'm not asking for things to return to how they were. I'm only asking for one chance.. to prove that I can love you the right way this time, because losing you once was already more than enough. 

I'm slowly forgetting what peace feels like. 

My nerves are killing me. My body feels stiff. And my soul is unmoving. My heart feels as if it is being torn apart and all I could do is feel it. Shattering. With every stabbing pain, with every hitched breath, with every tears. 
          
          All I could do is feel it. 
          
          Don't inflict more pain on me, baby.. Don't seek anything from anyone. It would hurt me more and more. Tenfold. 
          
          Loving someone means not inflicting any more pain even after your break. It would kill me as I am already tired. Exhausted. Mahal kita. Mahal na mahal. Please don't break my heart any more. It would honestly and painfully kill me.