Savi

"Everything I loved became everything I lost.."

"When I said it was over, I meant it. But now I can't let you go. But still I can't accept that you make me feel so..
          You make me feel so low.."

RIP Avery. You will be missed. It was nice seeing everyone at school coming together and wearing blue in your memory. Tomorrow we will wear black. Fly high Avery, and one day we'll all meet again. 

"That little kiss you stole,
          It held my heart and soul.
          And like a ghost in silence,
          I disappear..
          Don't try to fight the storm
          You'll tumble overboard 
          Tides will bring me back to you.."

As I sit alone at night
          I cry in pain 
          As I talk to you
          To make sure you're okay
          But what you don't know
          Is that inside I'm breaking
          My heart is in pieces 
          And my body is shaking 
          My stomach turns upside down
          And my smile has faded into a frown
          And my wrist may bleed
          And my face stained with tears
          But still I hide it
          I can't face my fears
          I'm afraid to hurt you
          Hurt you more with my pain
          You already have enough
          You need no more to gain 
          So I'll sit alone at night
          And I'll cry in pain
          And I'll give my own life
          To make sure yours is okay..

I loved you
          But then you cut too deep
          And then you were fighting for your life
          You lost
          I don't want to be with anyone else
          Only you,
          So I plan just one more week
          Then we'll be together forever..
          Me and my love,
          How stupid you were..
          I don't want to go so early..
          But you are my life..
          I'm coming baby..

I'm slowly falling apart...

Maybe it's just me,
          Maybe it's just you,
          I'm crying right now..
          I don't know what to do..
          Sink or swim?
          Disappear?
          One or the other,
          The choice is clear
          Goodbye my love
          I love you dear..
          Just know
          I couldn't stand being here,
          Without your love
          Without you near
          I need you
          I want you
          But in the end
          The choice is clear..
          Goodbye my love..
          I love you dear..

When I'm upset..
          I shut myself down.
          I have no motivation for anything. 
          I tell myself nobody cares,
          Even though I know some do..
          I think of all the negative things
          I could possibly think of..
          I give myself all the pain,
          Thinking I deserve it.
          I'm not sure why I do that,
          But that's just how I am..

I never meant to depend
          On you, on anyone,
          Because I promised that
          I would never feel this way..
          But now maybe I need you
          The way the earth 
          Needs the sun
          To see another day..