Hey!
Youre really creative..your stories are amazing!
You just need to work on your Paragraphs- everytime a different person talks, you need to put it in a next line not the same paragraph
And dialogue tags- instead of using "said" try replacing them with "replied", "agreed", "asked", "mumbled", etc
Other that that..its good keep it up
Looking forward to reading more of your books
Goodluck