If you are what you eat, cannibals are the only real people in the world!

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I write it, you read it, I eat them-hold on, let me try again

Are you a healthy human? 'Cause you look scrumptious-absolutely not

If my future job fails, I'll work at a tanning salon so I can watch my food cook-

I will steal your heart after you read my books-no

 Believe in yourself-your enemy today could be your lunch tomorrow-!

I'm a vegan is a funny thing to say while you hand someone your newborn-

If humans make you sick, you should cook them longer-

How did a husband find out she was a cannibal?
He asked her to make him a sandwich...
And she did!

Roses are red, berries are sweet, Montana man arrested after his best selling jerky is found to be human meat-

If you and your friend are stranded and you run out of food, don't worry-at least you have each other!

At least that last one was positive...

"Let's eat, Tommy!" Is correct at the dinner table
"Let's eat Tommy!" Is correct in all other instances

Okay, last attempt

Don't hate vegans, hate the people trying to shame you for what you eat!

Perfect!

Sooly <3

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