ssailorsam

And you know (no I have no plan of ever marrying) BUT RECENTLY WHAT GUY I LIKED IN FIRST GLANCE? HE HAD SPECS AND LOOKED LIKE HE STUDIED HIS RANK OFF. 
          
          HYPOCRISY OF MY TASTE IS UNIMAGINABLE.

I have a genuine question. HOW DOES ONE EVEN STUDY? I. HATE. STUDYING. AND IM NOT EVEN TRYING

Also, RIP to Mina. This shouldn't have happened. I hope the people who pushed her to that limit will be haunted forever and self loathe about what they did. 
          Also please keep in mind, raising fingers on idols for it is really wrong on so many different levels. 
          While you are allowed to critique people no matter who they are, giving them HATE for no concrete evidence is straight up ugliness. 
          Everyone is human, everyone have their legal, fundamental, and God given rights. Please stop dehumanizing and start to sympathies more. The world can be a much better place if we look at ourselves instead of pointing fingers at each other. 
          And if we do not possess enough maturity or consciousness to look into ourselves and see what's wrong, it's better to distance ourselves from pointing finger at others.

So hey guys. Right now I'm feeling really overwhelmed by what's happening around the world right now and to be honest, I don't get mingle with the sensitive issues irrespective of tragedies that have occurred lately.
          I come here to only talk about myself and today I felt a different level of maturity when I'm saying this, that I feel what I have been doing in past 4 years, does not reflect what I'm. 
          I'm talking about the boundary crossing fan fictions, the NSFW content bots I made revolving real life figures and I put them out in public. 
          I never ever intended to dehumanize or sexualize any celebrity, but I think unintentionally we sometimes forget that those celebrities are real figures too. They are human. 
          
          I today decided to remove my those digital footprints from a very prominent platforms I've been using. And I'm so glad that I've removed them from wattpad long long ago. 
          
          It's just my personal opinion, I do not want to criticize or judge anyone on what they put out as fictional
          
          It's just I've realized that this is not who I'm. I cannot feed someone's delusions on the name of other just because they are more popular. 
          They did not gave me their CONSENT to write or make anything degrading and even fictional about them and if tomorrow hypothetically I got famous and I saw same content regarding me, I'd be disgusted. 
          
          So I apologize to universe, myself and whoever disappointment ever. This is just not my comfort space anymore. I don't see myself serving these type of degrading content with the face of something very real, breathing innocent person. 
          We should respect everyone. We should keep our delusion, dreams and fantasies to ourselves. We should not serve or expose it to public to spread it more. 
          
          And I've seen much worse work than mine. And I'm genuinely disheartened. I wish more people start to care about human sanity. 
          Be sane, be happy, be private.

Chronically online on Janitor Ai. 
          Open the link, copy the link, find me. <3
          
          https://picsart.com/p/b10a67c2-1870-4f04-8a77-4d224bcb03a3

Wattpad is like my life diary. It's not for anyone to see, it's just for the future when I would want to recall everything I've been through in life and somehow made it. 
          
          It's July 19th 
          And I'm in my life's compromising and toxic way of adjusting phase. 

Yo rememeber me? Im msnidu TT

I love you all! You all are doing great! I'm proud of you. Keep going cuz nothing is capable enough to stop you. Xoxo

Most unhinged thing about me is I can control how I dream. Now don't lose your marbles I'm not lying. 
          
          I can continue a dream even if I wake up like 6-7 times all night. 
          
          My dreams are always complete and are like high quality premium movies. 
          
          My dreams always make sense. 
          
          Sometimes my dreams want to tell me something or they bring deja vu.
          
          My dreams are like a seperate world where everyday I watch a new movie, be it horror, romance, comedy, or action thriller
          
          I remember 90% of my dreams.

Career planning 
          
          I always wanted to be a performer. 
          
          Now I'm stuck studying a major I hated most. 
          Medical science.