I’m glad that I was able to help in some way. You really are an amazing person and you deserve the world.
The book is called the Book of Mormon. You may have heard of it. It’s one of the primary sources of scripture in my church, the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and it gives a record of the people in ancient America, and gives an account of a visit of Jesus Christ after his Crucifixion and Resurrection.
As I said before, it might not solve all of your problems, but that book and everything it’s led me to has helped me to find happiness and joy in my life. I know that everything written in that book is true and that God really does love each and every one of us, regardless of where we are and what we’ve done. I truly believe that his book and the church it’s connected to is the source of my happiness in life. If you let it, it can help you find yours.