@sugarchipp
hot damn, i unpublished apple boy because it fucking sucked and i wanna be an original boy. i’ve got some ideas for stories, please stand by.
god dAmN i love cuddling with my friends like hnnNnNnNg
they want to start checking my phone. that only makes me hate everything more. i hate that now i feel like my parents don’t trust me with anything because i’m the “poor, helpless child” in the family who hurts herself every single fucking time she’s alone. like that actually happens. when i’m alone, i’m not usually cutting into my arms, only once or twice a week it gets that bad, when the depression finally hits after feeling nothing for so damn long. they don’t trust me anymore all because someone noticed the marks on my arm and put it in a fucking google doc, which got sent to the school counsellor because we have such a “caring” school. i told them i didn’t hurt myself anymore, and even though that was a lie, i won’t do it. i made a promise to one of my best friends i wouldn’t do it. and this is all because of our stupid fucking gym class, where girls can wear leggings under their uniforms, but we can’t wear shirts because god help someone be self conscious about their arms. why can’t i be trusted? it’s not like i’m texting my friends that i want to off myself, i already know how that ends, i’ve been on the friend side. plus, even if i was talking about it to my friends, our generation uses snapchat most of the time so the messages disappear into mist. i have that my parents can’t trust me for some fucking reason, even though i’ve been nothing but trustworthy, now they have a tracker on our phones and they decide that they might start looking through mine, like that’s fair for me. why not check my sister’s phone? she’s got much more to hide.
my mom told me that the people i hang out with are too gloomy. alright, i won’t hang out with depressed kids. that eliminates around three quarters of my friends. they need to be always happy, she said. that cuts out 7/8 of the people i have. they should be good influences. there goes the rest, except for about three people. i should hang out with kids my age. i’m left with one person. well, okay, so i’m basically friendless now. no unpopular kids anymore, as they have all disappeared. let’s try the popular group. i would bet most of them are depressed and the rest are high. there goes everyone in my grade. my mom basically wants me to only hang out with one girl. fml
