sungshinehehe

@soobinchoi_official hi love <3

GUESS WHO'S WRITING AND COMMETING ON STUFF ON THEIR SCHOOL'S LAPTOP IN COMPUTER CLASS MUEHEHEHEHEEEEEE- we need to make some random asf table about ''pLaNnInG oUr bIrThDaY PaRtY'' GURL STFU IDK HOW TO PLAN A GAWDDAMN BIRTHDAY PARTY- I CAN ONLY PLAN HOW TO TIDY UP THE HOUSE WHEN PEOPLE COME OVER
          
          Anyways hehe- im srry if there are any grammar mistakes or something like that, the keyboard aint working rlly well but anywayz-
          love yall :33

Fb

soul ml hey you okay?
          you won't respond to my WhatsApp messages too or calls
          im worried
          you haven't done anything stupid right?
          it's been a week..

worst day ever.
          
          1. my mom put me up to go on a ''mini date'' w one of my friends  (even tho I HATE her) without even ASKING ME if i wanted to go.
          
          2. my father yelled at me for absolutely no reason and i almost cried.
          
          3. I lost my 20-day streak on Duolingo that I worked so.dang.hard for.
          
          4. second day of my perio and i almost bled through my jeans.
          
          5. it's Moonbin's birthday. how can i be happy at that?
          
          6. i feel like i have burnout syndrome or smth. how was it called-
          
          
          
          
          
          I feel miserable. Absolutely miserable.

I feel like this was one of the best school days I've ever had.

Hun let's call this weekend okay
          Saturday? Or Sunday?
          Tell me the time okii

I cannot lose more people

Soul please

I'm slowly dying.
          
          I don't have a medical condition or something like that, but inside? I'm dying. I'm falling apart. Fading. I lost everything,  everyone and whatever I do, I will never be enough. My parents will never learn how to respect me and not go through my stuff, they will never stop yelling at me even if I haven't done anything wrong,  they'll always be super dramatic and gaslight me, they will forever be strict and toxic, and I will forever be mistreated with a lot of weight on my back. 
          "You were such a cute little baby when you were little, you were so happy" well of course I was. I was a child. A fucking CHILD. I didn't study and work a lot, and plus I've changed. "Oh, how I wish you were 4 years old again" STOP COMPARING THE PRESENT ME WITH MY YOUNGER ME. STOP. IVE CHANGED AND I AM NOT GOING TO BE A SUNSHINE RAY AGAIN BECAUSE I CANT BE HAPPY WITHOUT BEING TREATED PROPERLY. MY FAMILY LITERALLY TREATS ME WORSE THAN A DOG AND THEN THEY ASK ME WHAT'S GOING ON. 
          LIKE- WAKE UP!!!!!!
          "You're overreacting"...no, I'm not. I'm overwhelmed and humiliated every day and my parents do not give a shit about me.
          That's my life. I have to get used to it.
          
          
          ....
          
          I hate it.
          
          Ykw? I'm making a diary. I'm gonna write all my thoughts down and also put dates where I'm gonna attempt to commit suicide. If the date doesn't work out then I'll change it.  That's a great idea, isn't it?
          I wanna jump and I don't think someone is gonna run to me and catch me before I fall. 
          If I die...please text me, even if I'm gone.
          
          I love you guys.