talktoemspooky

so proud of you! you’re amazing! keep your head up! ❤️❤️❤️

thinking of you always my love! ♡ 

77 days sober today. I miss you all! I was shocked to see the influx of reads on "Keeper and Protector" but I'm guessing it's from the new era/album being released.
          
          I'm still slowly but surely working on the edits, but being in this program is mentally exhausting at best, so I think to get more done once I graduate. I'll be moving into an Oxford House soon and I'm excited to finally have my independence back again.
          
          But we out here. As always, much love to all my readers and friends on here. Your support means much, much more than you know.

Uh hi yes, sorry for disappearing again. I was forced to go back to Nashville last month and my toxic family sent me back into a spiral so I started self-medicating with alcohol and the devil's lettuce again. :') But I just spent 16 days in a rehab in KY and I've been back in Knoxville since Friday; I'm at my old PHP program/housing to treat my co-occurring disorders. But East TN is home to me, so I don't plan on leaving again.
          
          While I was in rehab, I wrote out the outlines for the second act and climax of "My Pretty Keeper." I'm excited to expand upon what I came up with. I also plan to re-edit K&P and MPK (yet again) because I always want my readers to have the very best from me.
          
          I haven't forgotten about y'all. Hope y'all haven't forgotten about me.
          
          Stick with me, frens, I appreciate you.
          
          (P.S. I'm 22 days sober today so that's rad)

So as of now, Knoxville is home. It was stressful at first to not have any family around (like my mom) and have to rely on just myself, but I'm slowly getting used to it. My future goals are to work, save up money to rent a room somewhere (and finally have my own bedroom after six months of roommates!) and we'll see where life takes me from there. I need a freaking vacation lmao.
          
          I turned 26 on Feb 11th. I haven't wrote much since I've been in treatment, except for poetry; while I was in residential, I randomly got really inspired to write poetry, so I wrote a bunch of those. I'm ready to start writing again, though; I have some big ideas for MPK and I'm planning some super secret projects as well.
          
          Thank you for all of your continued support. Gosh, it blows my mind that people are still reading K&P. I'm still so proud of it all these years later.
          
          Btw Overcompensate is an absolute banger and I can't wait to listen to the full album. Once I saw those red stripes on all the album covers on Spotify (except for Self-titled) I knew the hiatus was about to end soon. The fact that Tyler has been working on this storyline, composed and recorded everything AND is due to have a third child soon... that's insane and I admire that.
          
          (Also, Tyler and Josh, I was part of the 0.1% of your top listeners on Spotify, will you pls come to the house and play a living room set pls & thx)
          
          Stick with me, frens, I appreciate you.

Uh hi yes I'm still alive haha.
          
          Back in September, my mom and I were illegally evicted. I had the choice to either be homeless or go live with my abusive father/stepfamily. My mental health was already bad before everything went to shit and so I made plans to unalive myself. That's the closest I've ever been to doing it.
          
          As a last resort, though, I searched and found this residential mental health/substance abuse facility outside of Nashville. I was approved for admission and that's when my mental health journey began.
          
          I spent a month in residential; I was re-diagnosed with Bipolar II and Borderline Personality Disorder, and also diagnosed with severe anxiety and PTSD. After that, I went to Chattanooga and spent a week and a half in a shitty PHP program. So I AMA'd from there and drove to Knoxville to another PHP/IOP program for mental health/substance abuse... They provided housing and all that, so I spent four and a half months there, three in PHP and the rest of the time in IOP. There was a lot of tears, working through trauma, seeing friends come and go, people AMAing to go relapse, housemates from hell... But there was also a lot of laughs, memories and the absolute most caring and amazing staff and clients who I now consider friends for life.
          
          I just graduated a few weeks ago and now I'm living in a halfway house with an amazing group of ladies. I'm the only one here for mental health issues but I've learned so much over these months about addiction, relapse and staying clean. I've also been to a lot of recovery meetings and have been moved to tears hearing different stories.

Heyyy, I followed your IG with my art IG. Lol.

I re-edited "Bad Habits" so feel free to check out the new and improved version.
          
          In the last chapter of "My Pretty Keeper," I mentioned making a spam book so you guys can get to know me better + whatever else I want to post in it. I'll post it in the near future once I come up with a few entries.

My latest oneshot/book, "He Will Be Loved," is now out. It's 12k words so please take all the time you need in reading it. I hope you enjoy. ♡

Uh I just posted Chapter 18 of My Pretty Keeper. I'm plotting out how the rest of the book will go, but for now, please enjoy a fluffy and smutty slice of life chapter.
          
          I was supposed to start college next month but life sucks so I'm starting in January 2024 instead. If all goes well, I'll graduate in December 2026 and get licensed as a registered nurse shortly after.
          
          I'm in between jobs right now (hopefully not for long) and I'm eagerly awaiting my paycheck from my last job to come in next week so I can get my nails done. I need to practice more self-care.
          
          How have you guys been?