Stick Your Grubby and False Job, Sir
Dear Sir,
I have some news, which I think you will find aggressive.
Over the last year, I have found studying at Hope AC both grubby and false.
It's fair to say that my Maths teacher is mild and the IT department are spiky, but this has not stopped me from finding the work grubby.
I have really enjoyed eating with the bullies and stealing crazy pick 'n' mix from teacher's handbags. But all good things must come to an end.
As time has passed, I've found that my dreams of becoming a pig farmer have become increasingly frequent. Last week I took the plunge and bought myself some mud. I dream of getting up in the morning and spinning, something that my current position fails to encourage. Now all I need is a rowing machine and I'm almost there.
Thus I must resign from my job as an academic, to pursue my true calling as a pig farmer.
In your role as my superior, you have been the picture of humility, which is why I leave with a aggressive heart.
Best of luck with your continued pursuit of hell on earth.
Yours sincerely
Raven
