Jax

I might start up writing again

I am going to be moving all my works to ao3 because I fucking hate this app. Of course this will take me time, so I guess enjoy them before I delete my account.

I’m always searching for that song,
          That beat,
          The one that strikes the chord in my heart when the beat drops, 
          That makes my stomach churn and flutter with awe, 
          I want that heart wrenching, gut clenching, nostalgia that hits me like a truck and leaves me jarred with shock.
          I want to cry my eyes out to this song, to laugh til I can’t breath. To scream to it with my demons.
          I want to feel it in the depths of my soul, ringing with an echo in my ears.
          I need it to ruin me. To bring me to life. To kill me. To resurrect me, then spit me out.
          I’ve been grasping for that song, searching for the air it gives me like I’m suffocating on its poison.
           To find my mind’s darkest places and scratch at them like an itch that hasn’t been sated in a millennium.
          To throw me into a whirlwind of emotions that leave my mind nothing but star-stuck mush.
          I want to play it at full volume til my ears bleed my tears, til I’m sick of it enough to vomit up the lyrics.
          This song is my drive, my reason for opening the door to the abyss called my mind.
          ....I just need to find it.

I took a nap and had this dream that I was on my period and it was so bad, and in the dream some random guy was like "why are you so crabby? Are periods that bad?" And I got so angry I started crying and I ripped my uterus out and handed it to the horrified teen boy and I'm sniffling through a clogged and snotty nose and I go "yes they are that bad, want a turn?" And then he had my period for a day and came back to me crying and asking me to take it back and my response was “only if you make me Dino nuggies and tea like a slave.” And he wiped a tear and hands me back my uterus and then I woke up in cold sweat. I’m not sure what you guys are going to do with this info, but whatever.

I have some drafts that will never be posted because I was horny and they never should have been written about, but you guys will never get to read them because I just know I’ll get hate for quite a few of them. 
          I didn’t spend hours loving the plot I thought up for them, just for me to be terrified that people are going to say horribly means things about them. 
          I will literally bawl my eyes out if that happens

I feel bad for the people who are trying to follow a specific story but my stupid self made 40+ stories as a procrastinator. Because don’t get me wrong, I have no problem getting 5-6 chapter out, but once it hits that mark, I’m too pooped out to continue 

HOW DO YOU GUYS EVEN LIKE THE STUFF IM WRITING?!?!?!? I DONT EVEN LIKE THE STUFF IM WRITING-

YOOOOOO 
          What if the reason we put dates everywhere when we celebrate something (besides remembering when an event took place) is because it’s for the time travelers?
          
          I swear I’m not high or drunk LOL

My discord link is in my bio.
          if there are any problems, let me know.

If I posted a link to my discord, would anyone join?