this message may be offensive
i hope that no one see it, it's just an outburst.
I’m really tired of my family, tired of my friends, tired of you, tired of me, tired of all
Everything tires me, and I can’t do anything. Now, my life is stay in my bedroom, watching series and hearing music, I lost my purpose, I lost what made me stand, I lost my mind and I don’t know where it. I’m always saying to people how they should act, I know, I shouldn’t do this, but I don’t know what it is, you know what it feels like to need to help everybody and at the same time being a little fucked by the feelings of others, you don’t know what it's like to have this conflict between light and shadow inside you and feel like a fucking XVIII-century baroque picture, you don’t know what it’s like to feel good and bad at the same time, so, just let me take care of others, just let me find a solution for them and drown me in my problems, let me be their light and my own darkness, watch me take care of them and be discarded by them.
Maybe someday I'll get tired of torturing myself like this, after all, everything tires me