tubby

Holy shit school starts in 5 days for me. I am not mentally ready for this shit.

Just waited like a whole fucking hour to go on call with my bf, called him a couple times and texted to receive no response so I just gave up. I’m close to passing out due to being sick (which he knows of) I honestly don’t know why he agreed to calling if he won’t respond

I was trying to quietly climb up my bed after staying down under my bed for a while longer to write in my emotion journal.... my bed deadass trying to snitch on my ass by being loud af, like bro? Could you be a little me quiet? Your a ladder no need to loudly creak and pop each step I take like fr bro. Tf.

I can actively hear my mum wrapping the Xmas presents. Oh the urge to just leave my room to get a “drink”. Don’t worry I’m not going to lol

sometimes i sneak off to my room during break, but my mum moved her desk around so it could be in a better spot which just happens to be near her door... she can now see if i sneak to my room or not :/

NO I JUST NOTICED THAT I DIDNT SAVE THE BOOK I WAS REALLY ENJOYING INTO MY READING LIST- I DINT REMEBER ITS TITLE SHRUSHNFHDHS

sO i know this may sound be weird but earlier today i have a... experience with a pedophile :DD so as you know im 15, a minorrr, and i was at the movies today to watch Free Guy (loved the movie!!) and there was like 3 guys in the row in-front of me, as i was walking up the stairs and behind them there was one guy that uh watched me walk up the stairs and then when i was walking behind them the guy turned around and tried to look up my skirt!!! i was very uncomfortable and now i feel uncomf in my own body due to this!! uh i told my mum and brother about it since i was with them but yeah!! stay safe out there.

I fell in love, and I love him a lot. I’m scared of this love but I can’t help it., he makes me feel so safe, so welcome, so free. I’m going on call with him for the first time tomorrow, I’m nervous and excited!! I’m glad I had met him. He is my safe person.

Do you ever just get to that moment where you just lay in bed and think about where things might’ve went wrong? Like how one moment everything’s ok then the next moment it’s not... I do that a lot and it honestly ends with me crying myself to sleep, it’s just the worst kind of feeling I experience before sleep that it makes me dread the morning to come but I know I gotta keep positive and keep moving because I have people I care about and gotta be with... but then the trust issues, anxiety and trauma come in and make shit worse... why can’t life be easy? Why can’t I just be a fucking free spirit kid again.