I read your book twice. I'm somebody's dad you will never know, but she went through some similar stuff. Hope it helps to know somebody random cares. Hope your therapist can help you find your way out, I know how it is when you don't feel loved by a parent and they are struggling with loving themselves. Also, divorce sucks. Everything feels so directed at you, while at the same time it feels like nobody can see you are hurting. I am here two decades later, dealing with some of it yet as I raise my daughter, but the depression REALLY subsided as I got older and I met good hearted, healthy, moral people I could look up to as role models. I found them through work and church, but there are many good people out there. I do wish I had spent more time with a therapist long before I got married and again as pre-marriage counseling.
Soooo, I just came here to say thanks for the read, etc. and to see if you had any more poems. Instead, I made you read half a novel, sorry 'bout that!