With times passing i suddenly realise all the things that helped me grow into someone i am rn is vanishing, the memories the excitement the nostalgia evrything! I once used to come home from school and get soo excited about reading fanfic, using Amino to chat w my international friends, like I hated the hours I had to be in school and tuition, late night binge reading, each chapters were filled w suspense and excitement, the butterflies i got dammit! I still can't get over Amino app dissolving, like all the people I met there is buried w the app itself. All my friends, all of the young teens at that time who were as excited and as thrilled as me to figure so many things out. Being a kpop Stan was one of the feeling too, being connected to other young teens w the same interests as you were the best part. I used to think I'd die for BTS, no doubt they are the best part of my life but rn they're just a concept for me, idols, memories and rn I am just a known listener of theirs and not a fangirl who would go crazy each time they'd post, used to wait and do the count down until their mv drops, used to save the "streaming goals" post so I would be very dedicated and not forget what my duties are in the fandom. Each new pfp, each new friends, each matching pfp, each ff, each sharing the same interests are just memories now. I miss my childhood, I miss my teen years, I miss myself when I was growing up and I miss me when I wasn't drowning in life because of life. I miss BTS and the feelings I used to hold when I was a proper fangirl, I miss Everything. I hope someday in the future I can go back to all my accs and posts and cherish it. I hope someday I can just think of all the good times I've had and laugh about it. I hope to meet all the friends all over again that I've lost in the initial years of growing up. I just miss how life was back then! Enjoy your life to fullest.
