Hey, I just wanted to point out something about your writing style. Instead of combining your thoughts with the story narration lines, could you separate them and add your thoughts as an 'Author's Note' at the end? Additionally, when you're unsure about grammatical and spelling mistakes, consider checking with Google or another reliable source for help.
This will help readers stay more engaged and attentive while reading. If you're aiming for a concise style, this approach is perfect. However, if you don't mind writing more detailed and long chapters, I'd recommend it if you added more descriptions within each passage to help readers visualize the scene better.
No offense intended, I just wanted to help. If I have offended you, I apologize.( ◜‿◝ )♡
Sending you love and a big hugs(づ￣ ³￣)づ! I hope your day is as amazing as you are! By the way, I read the updated 12th chapter today and I really enjoyed it (✷‿✷) - great job! Keep shining!"
