Hi, my pen name is Calum. I'm 20 years old and I love to write stories where you fart of laughter and cry like you have a boyfriend. 

I also love to read books about demon-hunting, half-angle, incest-committing siblings; a hot prodigy who thought a robin hood-wanna-be killed his gay older brother; about a boy who found out he's a wizard and spent seven books just to kill his arch nemesis who has no nose; and finally a retelling of beauty and the beast except there's a lot more sex.

Okay, this is getting long but, oh, look a cookie.