Let's start with the rain 'cause rain is something that's clear and real.. And my story is hard enough to believe as it is. Also.. The rain obscures without lying.. And I don't know which parts of my story are real anymore..

   And which parts are just a phantom of my memory.

                                                                                                                                                            .

   Up until very recently, I used to feel like this fly I once saw in class--Banging it's head against the invisible barrier over and over again, buzzing away desperately to escape into a larger world--So hungry for something new and nobody's even noticing.

   I was small, invisible.. just wasn't worth noticing. 

   Until.. Avril Lavigne--Her music has always been there for me. It was in every part of my life. And even though it seemed to come from so far away.. It felt like it was aimed right at me LIKE A MISSILE! Her music took away the numbness and made me feel less alone.

   Oh, and by the way, the fly died the next day. :(