‘Something about me, not many people know. Just have to share this. No negative comments please.’
Nothing in life is promised, except for death.
Hey,
I am Jelke, and my life is a complete mess.
It all began when i was about 10 years old. The years before that aren't really worth to mention, logical, because I'm actually never worth mentioning...
Every monday I had ballet lessons, with girls who hated me, and were a lot thinner than me.
At least, I thought they were, but they weren't. I developed an eating disorder in a year, so when I was 11 i was underweight, and not just a bit. I still actually have to gain some weight, but i don't want to. I hate my body, and there will never come a time that i'm happy with my body, I think my body is absolutely disgusting. I hear a lot of people say that i only say that because i want attention, but i don't. I'm not attractive and people never have crushes on me. When my doctors thought i was completely recovered, it actually just begun. I already isolated myself from people since i was 4. Being alone made me feel comfortable and i could do what I want and listen to the music i like. Things just got worse, and i don't really have a soulmate where i can share everything with. I had one, but I lost him..
I often asked myself the question: am I alive, or am I just existing?
