You have a lot of trash under your bed. I do not appreciate. 

I watch MHA under your bed, surprised you don't see the light from the screen. Also, I stole your AirPods before you even got them, would like to apologize, but I'm keeping them anyway. I appreciate the lost food that ends up under your bed, I get a daily snacc that way. Also, I hold your hand at night because I'm lonely.

Would like to say that the noise you hear sometimes is me trying to find your charger port.

I appreciate living with you while you don't know it, you provide a nice living space for me.