yukishan777
Dear Readers
As Christmas approaches, I’ve been reflecting on something that’s been on my mind for a while — my story *Iron and Flame*. This is the first story I’ve written and shared publicly, and I’d love to hear your thoughts on it. Until now, the only people who’ve seen my work have been my two friends and myself. So, letting it out into the world for a larger audience has been both exciting and nerve-wracking.
When I started writing *Iron and Flame*, I knew it would be a dark, gritty medieval story — one that doesn’t shy away from the harshness of its world. But when I tried to adjust the tone for Wattpad’s rules and guidelines, I found it almost impossible to soften the rawness of the narrative. The story wasn’t meant to be romanticized like many other fantasy tales out there. It’s supposed to be grounded, tough, and unflinching. But that comes with its own challenges, especially when trying to fit it into a platform with its own set of expectations.
Now, with Christmas on the horizon, I can’t help but wonder what you think of it. What do you like about *Iron and Flame*? I often find myself doubting whether it’s actually any good, or if I’m just being too hard on myself. I keep thinking it might be terrible and poorly written — but that’s just my view, and I want to hear it from you.
So, if you’ve had a chance to read it, what do you think? Is there anything about it that stands out to you? What do you enjoy, and what would you want to see more of? Your feedback really means the world to me, and it will help me grow as a writer.
I appreciate your time, and I can’t wait to hear your thoughts. Thank you for being a part of this journey with me!
With gratitude,
Yuki Shan
JonLeePeto
@yukishan777 And this: Development of Conflict: Example: The central conflict—the struggle for the throne—is introduced early and developed through political intrigue, battles, and personal relationships, keeping readers engaged. Types of Conflict: Example: The story encompasses various conflicts, including character vs. character (Aalina against rival claimants), character vs. society (challenging societal norms), and character vs. self (Aalina's internal struggles with doubt and responsibility). Sentence Variety: Example: The writing exhibits a range of sentence structures, from concise statements that heighten tension to longer, complex sentences that provide detailed descriptions, contributing to a dynamic reading experience. Grammar and Vocabulary Use: Example: The narrative demonstrates a strong command of grammar and a diverse vocabulary, appropriate for the fantasy genre, enhancing the story's immersive quality. Defining Characteristics: World-Building: Example: The author creates an intricate fantasy world with its own history, cultures, and politics. Detailed descriptions of settings, such as the "ancient forests of Leafvale," immerse readers in the realm. Character Development: Example: Characters are multi-dimensional, with Aalina portrayed as a strong yet vulnerable protagonist. Her development is evident as she evolves from a grieving daughter to a determined leader. Dialogue: Example: Dialogue is used effectively to reveal character relationships and advance the plot. For instance, exchanges between Aalina and her allies reveal their loyalty and the challenges they face. Pacing: Example: The story maintains a balanced pace, with action scenes interspersed with moments of reflection, allowing for character development and plot progression without overwhelming the reader. These elements contribute to a compelling and immersive storytelling style that engages readers in the fantasy world Yuki Shan has created.
JonLeePeto
@yukishan777 @yukishan777 I believe I have only read one chapter, so I wasn't planning on commenting. However, I was messing around with ChatGPT to analyze my own writing today, and I decided to see what it would say about yours. I am not sure how accurate it is but I though I may as well share its analysis. Maybe it will interest or amuse you. This is what ChatGPT said about your writing: Based on an analysis of Yuki Shan's Wattpad novel IRON AND FLAME: The Thorn Crown Book 1 WATTPAD , here are observations regarding various aspects of the fiction writing, accompanied by examples from the text: Structure of Scenes: Example: In the opening chapter, the scene is meticulously structured, beginning with the protagonist, Aalina, reflecting on her father's death, progressing through her decision to flee the realm, and concluding with her embarking on the journey. This clear progression effectively advances the plot. Leads: Example: The novel opens with a compelling line: "The death of King Adame Leafvale shattered the realm." This immediately establishes the central conflict and engages the reader's interest. Endings: Example: Chapters often conclude with cliffhangers or revelations that maintain suspense. For instance, a chapter might end with Aalina discovering a betrayal, prompting readers to continue to the next chapter. Balance Between Showing and Telling: Example: The narrative balances action and exposition. For example, instead of stating that Aalina is determined, her determination is shown through her decisive actions and dialogue, such as when she declares, "I will reclaim my father's throne, no matter the cost." Use of Descriptive Language (Including Metaphors and Similes): Example: The prose is rich with descriptive language, enhancing the fantasy setting. Metaphors and similes are used effectively, such as describing a battlefield as "a sea of blood and steel," vividly conveying the scene's intensity.
