forgotten love -Nicholas Chavez

33.

No lyrics.

*7 months later*
Nicholas.

"Baby...Baby wake up!" Alana says as she kisses my cheeks.

I groaned and purposely roll over onto her. Making her laugh. I loved hearing her laugh. I finally get all the way up and she hugs me from behind kissing my back as I sat on the edge of the bed.

"I have to go train today. Are you coming to my fight Saturday?" I say.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world!" She says as she lets go of me.

I smile at her as I walk over to the bathroom and start to freshen up. Brushing my teeth, washing my face, etc. I then walk out and get on gym clothes. I come out and go into the hall smelling breakfast. I loved her cooking it always warmed me up it was like she made all of her food with love.

I sat down and ate with her before taking off and kissing her goodbye starting my run around the block.

It's been 7 months since...I walked out of that hospital. After she told me it was over. I relapsed heavily on drinking because of that. I don't even mention her or them at all Alana forbids it because she knows how much it ruins me. I feel like if I were to see her again I would be able to hold my ground. Christmas is arriving soon and my birthday past along with the anniversary of Aaliyahs death, which are all days I'd spend with...her and she'd make me feel so special and loved and...and. I need to stop. It's just crazy how time flies....when your life is falling apart and causes you to be fucking depressed and no one knows because you hide it so everyone can stop asking me about shit.

Alana and I have been officially dating for 6 months and she's been more than everything to me. I never thought I would be able to find someone new, someone like...her, but I did. I was blinded and thought she was the only person for me when really it was Alana. I canceled my fight with...him because Alana thought it would be too overwhelming for me which it would since last thing I saw in the hospital was her vividly holding a pregnancy test while hugging her mom and him.

It brought me to deep depression, I relapsed on my drinking habit and put Alana through hell, but she stuck up with me which I was so shocked about because only...you know who would be able to. She was the one to get me out of my deep habits, but I'm trying this new thing were I don't even think about or say her name or his. Believe it or not it's been working with me getting over it. I feel like because I held onto Aaliyah's death it made me feel like I had to do something. In reality to keep that murderer out of my life I had to let go of everything that attached back to him even...her. It sounds selfish, I know, but I couldn't bare it anymore. Mentally I was shutting down and I couldn't box while I was like this. If I wanted to go far in my boxing I had to get everything situated.

And it's all so crazy because all of this happened because of a car crash. This was not ever supposed to happen.

I ran to the scene knowing I shouldn't be, but things didn't add up to how it happened when I go past it and how it was described to me. We were stopped at the red light and the truck struck us... why wouldn't the truck stop when it was our right away to go? And then I never got to find out who hit us.

I look up at the stop light and saw there was a camera. There had to be some sort of footage and as much as Alana wants me to forget the past it's not helping me fully move on. I feel like she doesn't understand because it didn't happen to her. I go back to running and go to towards the bench as I was approaching it getting closer to it I see a woman laying down on it. She looked homeless and I felt bad for her because it wasn't warm outside at all and soon it would be snowing. Usually I'd sit here to think because it was so close to my accident, but probably should just go find another one.