chemical kiss | ashton irwin

Chapter Twenty Five

"And then...She just, told me she really hated me, and-and...I-I don't know," I sobbed.

"Shh, it's okay," Ash whispered softly into my ear. He hugged me tighter and stroked my back, then continued, "How come you didn't expect this anyway, baby? I hate to admit it but you really have been distant with her."

"You're not helping anything!" I whined. Ash sighed, and I kept crying. But he had a point-- why hadn't I expected this out of Janie?

"I'm sorry. I don't know what to say other than remind you that Janie is a bitch," Ash said. I kept quiet, other than the crying.

It had been a day since my terrible, terrible conversation with Janie and I was still devastated. She was there for me for everything and now our relationship was ripped apart.

Night had fallen hours before, and I was clinging onto Ash snugly and he held me as well. We were settled on the couch, and I was trying to sleep but I couldn't. The acknowledgement that my best friend had totally ditched me for life was awful and the thought clawed at my insides, jerked tears from my eyes. I couldn't stay asleep after I'd fallen into slumber for about half an hour, but Ash was awake the whole time, and I figured he was my best bet.

Ashton held me sweetly and continually told me it would be okay and that I needed to make myself happy and whatnot. I understood, and eventually I was asleep.

The next day I powered my phone off, just so that I wouldn't get any ideas. I didn't want to talk to anyone through my phone, because I knew somehow I'd end up texting Janie.

It was Friday, so the boys would be coming over later for band practice. I'd overheard Ash on the phone and learned that Calum was coming over early. Calum appeared at our house at two o'clock, smiling like always.

"Hey Ash, hey Thalia," Calum greeted. I smiled weakly as he sat on the couch and tapped his feet. His head tilted a little and he glanced sideways at Ash. He whispered something I couldn't totally make out, but I heard some keywords: ready to go?

"What's that?" I asked.

"Nothing," Ash quickly covered. "Calum and I are heading out for a bit, that's all."

"Oh," I said. I sighed as Ash kissed my forehead and he and Calum left the house so it was just me, myself, and I.

...

5 Seconds Of Summer had just gotten done singing Rejects when my cellphone rang. I ran upstairs to answer it, but the caller didn't let me talk.

"Look, Thalia. I'm sorry. I want you to just listen, and don't speak, okay? Hear me out.

"So, I know that what I have done is terribly wrong and you most certainly loathe me after it. It was the most terrible and awful thing I could probably manage in my life and I really, truly regret it. Playing you was like lying to my mother. I know I can't boss you around, or try and intimidate you, I don't have the right to do that. I may have thought I did have that right, but you sure proved me otherwise, you were absolutely correct. I was a rude jerk to you and all your friends, and I know it was horribly wrong and unbelievable of me. All I want is forgiveness, and I want to start again. You with me?"

I knotted my eyebrows together, quizzical. "No, no, I'm not with you, no. Why are you calling me? Don't you know it's over, and now there's no such thing as forgiveness? Somewhere deep I still regret even hearing your name the first time, I regret looking at you for a split second even. You honestly think I'm going to start over with you? Is it really that simple?"

"Well no, but it can be that simple. If you let it. Come on, Thalia."

"You don't understand," I sighed feebly, sat down on the bed Ash and I shared. "I moved on the day after it happened. And now it's a tad bit too late."