can you make it end?...

Everyones gone.

It was 2 months after the war. All of the deaths Harry witnessed came back to his memory, replaying each memory, torturing his mind in the process.

1. His Mother and Father.
they died for him. Lily protected him with all she could. he should've died there and then, and he wished he did. Died while protecting Harry from Voldemort.

2. Sirius Black
"Nice one James!" one of the sentences that stuck with Harry. Sirius was one he just had trust in. he didn't do anything to gain it, he just... gave over his trust i guess. "Get away from my Godson." Died while fighting his cousin Bellatrix Lestrange.

3. Remus Lupin
best DADA teacher he ever had. his secret got discovered by students and was forced to leave. he joined the order with Sirius as well as joining him with living at Grimmauld Place. He went to all his past friends funerals alone and died in the Battle Of Hogwarts.

4. Cedric Diggory
Tri-Wizard tournament competitor. it was the 3rd and last task, the maze. Harry and Cedric helped eachother to the end. turns out the cup was sabotaged to be a portkey leading to voldemort, which resulted in Cedric dying. Died from killing curse, used by Voldemort.

5. Severus Snape
No stranger to hogwarts. fellow potions master, soon upgraded to DADA teacher and Headmaster in harry's final year/s. He fell in love with Harry's mother, and would give Dumbledore anything to protect the family.
the person who they put their faith in, Peter Pettigrew, betrayed the family of 3, and severus, which ended up with the death of lily and james potter. he continued to protect harry throughout the years and started to care for him, but dumbledore "raised him like a pig for slaughter". Died by Voldemort's snake killing him in The Battle Of Hogwarts.

6. Fred Weasley
No unknown face to hogwarts. known for pranking students and teachers alike with his twin, George Weasley. He always cared for harry, along with George, even when most didn't. Died in The Battle Of Hogwarts with his family around him.

7. Albus Dumbledore
Was hogwarts headmaster for many faithful years. one of many that protected Harry in his years at hogwarts. gave snape a task to kill him when draco malfoy couldn't. Died while falling off the astronomy tower after being hit by the killing curse casted by severus snape.

8. Dobby
first met Harry in his bedroom while trying to convince Harry not to go in for his second year. Harry soon gave dobby a sock, making him free from the malfoys. later on he died in the deathly hallows after helping Harry and others escape malfoy manner. Died by being stabbed by Bellatrix Lestrange.

9. Tonks
Tonks was a part of the order, soon growing close with none other than Remus Lupin. soon having a child, Teddy Lupin. Died in The Battle Of Hogwarts next to Lupin.

10. Alastor Moody.
met Harry after becoming his DADA teacher in 4th year. he was replaced by an imposter and got put in a chest. the imposter sabotaged the cup and changed it into a portkey. the imposter soon to be identified as Barty Crouch jr, a well known death eater. knowing to be the most famous Auror of all time, Alastor helped out in the order. Died while helping Harry get to The Burrow.

Harry couldn't bare himself anymore. he was now sat in an apartment with empty and some full, beer bottles scattered around him, the smell of weed filled the air. On the table you could see two or three lines of cocaine waiting to be inhaled by Harry. he was just left alone in a room with his own pain and sorrow.

***
"oh Harry.." Remus said with a small frown.
Him and Sirius were given the duty to keep an eye on Harry from the comfort of heaven.
Remus and Sirius looked at each other. Remus knew how hard it was on Sirius, watching his Godson become a mess right in front of him. Turns out James started to not care for the boy anymore, making Lily not care as much as she used too either. Sirius and Remus felt like father figures to him, they watched most things he did, they watched him get drunk out of his mind, they watched him get higher than the clouds, they watched him smoke weed and normal cigarettes, but what they witnessed him do right now was one thing that made him and Sirius break down.

***
i stumbled to the kitchen, after downing 5 shots of vodka and 2 beers. My body was oblivious, but my mind knew what it was doing, drunken actions, sober thoughts. I reached for a draw, and realised it wasn't the one I needed. I left it open and rushed around the kitchen, slamming open all of the draws. I was on the last one, opening it carefully this time and found the thing my body was itching to grab. the knifes handle felt so right in my grip. I glided my finger over the silver, sending shivers down my spine. i held it up to my wrist and pushed it down roughly, the blood bubbling then dripping out onto the floor, a small smile forming on my face. I continued, until all i saw was red attacking my vision, then it all went black.

***
"R-Remus... We need to h-elp him!" Sirius sobbed into my shoulder. I let a stray tear fall from my glossed eyes, feeling like i failed as a friend... but i felt like a father to him, so did Sirius. we just sat there in our own tears.
"I'll go notify Dumbledore." i spoke quietly, allowing another tear drop from my eye.
"Alright, i will tell you if he wakes." he said, sniffing, trying to take away the idea of him crying, because Remus knew Sirius well, Sirius Black doesn't cry, at least he wants people to think that.

"D-Dumbledore?" i said, as his pale figure turned around to meet my eyes with his.
"ye- are you okay Remus?" he said slightly worried.
"N-no its Harry." i said, trying to push back the sobs.
"Harry? whats wrong??"
"He just passed out. he was cutting himself, there has to be atleast 30 cuts he did before he fainted." i explained, motioning for Dumbledore to come with me to the watch room.
"oh dear... we need people down there now. Remus, Sirius, if you two are up to it, i can let you both live once more, and help him." he explained as our eyes widened.
"yes we will go help him! please let us go!!" sirius started to sob again, wanting to see his godson so badly.
"Sirius, i knew the day you were chosen, you would be a good Godfather, never letting anyone get in the way of your responsibilities. And Remus, i trust that you will take on a father figure too? he once told me that you and Sirius were like fathers to him. " he explained, as my eyes filled up with tears.
" he sees me as a father? " i said, on the verge of happy tears.
" yes, now go, i will be waiting to hear from you. i will put Severus on watch, so if anything happens, i will help. "
Before we could say thankyou, we got pushed into this black hole by an odd force as Dumbledore gave us a sad, but hopeful smile.
Before we knew it we were stood outside an apartment door labled '34 lincon way' i looked down at myself then Sirius, we were wearing our favourite suits, and i had a key in my hand. i opened the door, not ready for the madness of helping a broken boy.