Cigarette Daydreams is just one of those songs that makes you want to yell out into the world because of how much it makes you feel, which is everything from happiness to loneliness and everything in between.
This song is about dealing with the problems in our lives that can sometimes seem like too much to handle.
People around you can see the pain you're going through, and even though giving up seems like a better and less exhausting resort, actively trying to look for the answers and fighting is still being done, despite the fear of getting hurt when opening up.
Closure: A state of mind.
Finding peace for oneself.
"I know you guys aren't on good terms right now," Estee cautiously started, filling Ashley in on what Fuckshit meant to pass as a message. "He said it was important."
As Estee went on to do the convincing, Ashley found herself zoning out from the many thoughts running through her brain.
Humans are survivors.
We find a way to move on otherwise it is damaging to our well being.
If Ashley didn't do this for herself, she would never get the closure she needed.
She thought in silence for a moment and weighed in her wondering thoughts.
Do people really even need closure, she thought.
Many think that they need something from the other person in order to move on, but has one ever thought that maybe all of the mental shifting needed comes within themselves?
That one can actually find closure with oneself?
Ashley had wondered this, but many times, Angela had wondered the same.
The only difference between both of them was the concept of letting go and holding on.
As Ashley got ready to head out and accept whatever closure she would get that day, Angela did the same by looking for hers and knocking on his door.
On the third knock, the door opened revealing a very confused Fuckshit.
"Angela?"
The girl gave out a small chuckle.
"I know I wasn't who you were looking for..." she said looking him up and down. "...kind of why I wanted to come by, set things straight?"
Fuckshit scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably and opened his mouth to object, but Angela quickly interjected in hopes of explaining her side.
"I clearly like you Fuckshit," she stated. "and it's not fair you used me as some sort of crutch to distract yourself from Ashley."
Fuckshit listened as the girl continued.
"Do you know how much that fucked me up?" she quietly whispered, tearing up as she thought back on how she dealt with her hurt.
"Look I'm sorry if I hurt you, but you used me as much as I did you and we weren't even a thing?" Fuckshit stated in confusion.
Angela understood that they weren't even a couple to begin with, but when love is removed or you are denied it, you'll tend to be affected psychologically.
"That's not the fucking point!" Angela cried out in disbelief, wondering when he would finally get it through his head.
"You don't just play with people's feelings whenever you feel like it Fuckshit. I've turned against myself, feeling, and thinking I'm not good enough..."
Fuckshit scoffed. "And you're saying this is on me?"
Angela ignored his remark and suddenly kissed him.
It so happened to be that at the exact moment Angela and Fuckshit's lips connected, Ashley turned the corner and came into view.
Fuckshit widened his eyes and quickly pulled away.
He eyed for a sign of Ashley, but found that she was already gone.
"See? I'm good enough," Angela stated with a wide smile.
Fuckshit glared his eyes towards the girl and said a line that broke her smile: "Not good enough for me."
As Fuckshit broke yet another girl's heart into pieces, the one that got away formed the answers to her earlier thoughts.
Closure isn't something we all think we gain from talking to the person that rejected us or hurt us.
It's not true.
Closure is what you get when you can finally find peace and let it go.
No on can move on for you.
You yourself have to do this on your own.
☆.。.:*・・°★.。.:*・°☆.。.:*・°*・°☆.。.:*・°
Someone commented that they felt bad for Angela in the one chapter so I wrote this one in order to get in some closure for whoever that person commented was xD
P.S. Angela is still a bitxch!
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